Page 30 of What I Needed

“It could be any number of things, but I’ve always told you that caring for others is your superpower. You just have to learn not to lose yourself in the process and remember to care for yourself when you're caring for others.”

“I know. Before my grandparents died, I was getting better at it. Since everything settled after their deaths, I’ve had a lot of time to focus on taking care of me.”

“You have, and I see your progress. A few years ago, you would’ve never trusted your gut and taken this job. I can’t imagine the list of reasons you would’ve come up with to remain stuck. I’ll admit that the circumstances were questionable, but you had a good feeling about it and went with it. Now look at you, growing and glowing like it’s nobody’s business.”

“I know. I’m content with my life for the first time since I was fifteen.”

“Why did you say content instead of happy?” she asked.

“I don’t know. I guess maybe I don’t want to jinx it.”

“Listen, just like you learned to feel your grief, you also need to learn to feel your joy. Don’t stifle your happiness waiting for the other shoe to drop. You know better than most that life happens, and this might sound cliché, but you have to learn to take the good with the bad.”

“I hear you, Dr. Black, and I’m listening. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome. That’s our time for today. I’ll see you next month.”

Our video call ended, and I released a deep, cleansing breath. It was time to start feeling my joy.

“You’re home early and with lots of bags. You went to the grocery store?” Erissa said when I entered the kitchen.

She and Riverlynn were in the family room, on a blanket in the middle of the floor.

“Yeah, we got out of practice early. I’m going to cook for you today.”

“Cook? You?”

“Yes, me. I can cook.”

“I specifically remember you saying you can’t cook.”

“No, I said I eat a lot of takeout. I never said I couldn’t cook,” I clarified.

She stood and lifted Riverlynn from the floor. My baby girl was getting so big and chunky.

“Okay. I stand corrected. What are you cooking?”

I stopped unloading the groceries for a moment to show Riverlynn some love. She smiled as I took her from Erissa, then giggled until she was out of breath when I kissed her cheeks.

“Rivvy told me your favorite meal is shrimp scampi pasta. Ain’t that right, baby girl.”

I returned her to Erissa’s arms and went back to unpacking the groceries.

“That’s not my favorite meal.”

“Good, because I’m making burgers on the grill. I stopped by Soulful Diner and got some corn on the cob, baked beans, and a salad.”

“You call that cooking?”

I shrugged. “I’m doing what I know how to do. Soon, it’ll be cooler earlier, so I was thinking we could get in the pool tonight. It’s heated.”

“The pool?”

“Yeah. That big square filled with blue water in the middle of the backyard.”

“Haha. You’re not funny. What about Rivvy?”

“If she’s awake, she can kick it with us.”