Page 134 of Rhodes

She's the only one in this state who knows what really happened. I told her just before the sky fell about Rhodes and me, so once he admitted to everything, she was the one who helped me work through the right way to handle it.

I pick at the same splinter she started on so I don’t have to look at her while I say it.

The truth costs Rhodes his name inside my family and inside his own, and it buys me nothing except the pleasure of being vindicated of a crime I already brushed off as naivety, and they bought. I made that trade in March for one reason, and now leaving the narrative untouched makes more sense than stirring the pot.

What I want is for one person alive to know I chose it instead of getting stuck with it, and she is the person. That’s why I told her.

She nods. She knows exactly what I mean. I don't have to lay any of it out, which is the thing about a twin.

Not once has she told me it was a mistake to shoulder the blame. She knows I'm tough and doesn't ask whether I can carry it, instead trusting my instinct and supporting me through it. She picks at the splinter and lets it sit where I put it.

"It all worked out, so, once again, you made the right decision," she says simply.

"You know Rhodes always said Grandbank was the only man alive who could out-stubborn a live oak."

Hearing his name out loud goes through my chest like a sucker punch. We've been simply using "he" or "him," without ever naming him, knowing exactly who we were talking about any time he came up.

My lungs quit halfway through. I have to start the breath over because I wasn't expecting that.

"He's not wrong," I finally say.

"Cooper has no idea about anything, right?"

"God, no. That's best for all of us. He's so wrapped up in moving home and starting this new position that fell into his lap, he hasn't had time for questions. I’d prefer it stay that way.”

"I can't believe he will be back in Charleston working. It will be so weird having him here and you back in New Orleans at the end of the summer. I'm not ready to let you go."

"You'll come see me. I'll actually have a good roommate and a pullout sofa. I'll be offended if you don't come at least once a month."

"That's aggressive. How about once a quarter?”

“Deal,” I say.

"Will you see Rhodes? I mean, I know not like that, but do you think you'll run into him?"

I was a little more prepared this time, but still the thought of him makes it hard to swallow.

"No, I don't think he comes around the Tulane areas of the city. I'm sure he'll be doing the corporate thing at Stone Intermodal. I'll be doing the college thing, and working on my reef project on the side."

"Yeah. Probably best, huh?"

"Mmm hmm." I push to my feet. "You ready for dinner? I'm starving."

I go inside before she can ask me anything else.

THIRTY-ONE

Rhodes

Disclosure: Louisiana requires a seller to put known defects in writing before the sale. The form asks what you knew and when you knew it, and it leaves no line at all for how much you were trying to spare somebody.

I leave my tie loose around my neck, fasten my cuff links, and open the drawer beside the stove. Without looking, I reach for the spatula. My hand closes around it on the first try.

I stand there for a second, staring down at the mess of wooden spoons and tongs Tallulah moved here months ago because, according to her, this was where a normal person kept things they used at the stove.

The phone vibrates against the counter. Who the fuck calls at six forty in the morning?

I turn it over to see it's Wells. Jesus. He never sleeps. I close the drawer and answer. "Somebody better be dead."