Page 31 of Knot Their Starlet

“Do what, Andi?” he bites back.

“Don’t throw a tantrum about this. My knight in shining armor was supposed to be you.”

He jerks backward as if my words sucker-punched him in the face.

His thick brows draw down, and I finally see the hints of the boy I fell in love with. The one who always felt things too hard, who was so insecure about what he could offer, who just wanted to be acknowledged by the world as good enough.

“You were the first one to point out that my mom wasn’t normal, back in high school. You were the one to tell me to move the hell out after I graduated,” I mumble. “Hell, we went fucking apartment hunting for this place together.”

I spread my arms out and wave at the kitchen around me. The kitchen he’s burned pasta water in. The kitchen where I’ve cooked him his crazy bulking meals with two pounds of chicken and a dozen eggs.

“And we don’t have to throw that away,” Ezra croaks, glancing wistfully around the room like he’s imagining the same things I am.

“There’s no we here, Ezra.” I rub at my sternum, where a deep ache lingers. “You were the one to burn everything we had to the ground.”

He blinks rapidly and shakes his head, his chin dropping to his chest. The black coffee notes of his scent, bitter with sadness, swirl in the air around us.

“I’m sorry, Andi, you have no idea. I’m so fucking pissed at myself for fucking this up,” he says, tears glittering in the dim light from the front hallway.

“You’re not the only one pissed off at this situation, Ezra. I’m pissed too. I thought—I thought what we had was proof that maybe I was deserving of some peace. Some safety. Turns out I was wrong.” The muscles in my forehead start twitching with my grimace.

He notices.

He takes a step back, his hands raised in surrender. The width of his shoulders deflates as he slumps with the motion.

“You were the only one who got my issues with my dad,” he mumbles.

“And you were the only one to get the shitshow relationship I have with my mom,” I answer in return, my voice going soft.

My phone chimes again, making both of us flinch.

“So your mom is making you go out with the omega now?” He’s familiar enough with my mom to know that this is the kind of opportunity she’d never let slip past her fingers. Even if that means making me play such a crazy part.

“Something like that.”

He doesn’t need to know the full details. He doesn’t need to know that my mom’s second option is him. That would just give him hope that something could happen between us when nothing will ever be the same again.

“Do you think he’s going to understand the craziness inside my brain when we go on our fake dates?” I huff, my lips pulling back into a grimace.

I don’t even know why I’m asking in the first place. Let alone to Ezra of all people.

But I know why the moment Ezra opens his mouth.

“You’re not crazy, Andi, never were,” he mumbles. “And for your sake, I hope he does. Because you deserve that.”

Fuck. My heart breaks all over again. Why does he need to say exactly what I need to hear after all he’s done to me?

What the fuck did I do to deserve this?

Why couldn’t we just be normal?

Why did he have to go and fuck things up and leave me all alone?

He tucks his shaky hands into his pockets, leaning back on his heels, looking just like the boy I fell in love with.

“I’m gonna go now. My dad’s probably going to skin me alive. Good luck, Andi.”

I don’t even need to ask him to leave my keys. He drops them into the ceramic shell dish on my shoe cabinet on his way out. The one we painted at an art studio together, back when we did cute dates. Before he got into drugs and alcohol.