Page 19 of Falling for the King

At his wife’s name he stiffened then turned slowly towards her.

‘I never have, nor do I intend to, fall in love. That would be impossible anyway since I don’t believe in it.’ He held himself so rigid, so unyielding, like he was making himself immune to the very notion of it.

She put her glass on the table willing her hands not to shake and kept her gaze level with his.

‘I don’t understand. What about your wife? You loved her.’

‘You think love is some kind of fairy dust that solves everything.’

She rose on legs she wasn’t sure would support her and went to the mantlepiece to stand next to him.

‘Don’t speak to me like I’m a child and don’t understand how the world works. Yes, I thought myself in love with Max and no, it wasn’t love. It was stupidity and youth and … hope.’

His eyes bored into hers.

‘You’re looking for love?’ His voice deepened rumbling all the way to the tips of her toes making them curl in her stilettos.

‘No, I’m not. That’s why I won’t marry again. I’m not interested in love and I wouldn’t marry without it.’

He frowned. ‘That’s crazy.’

‘It’s not.’

A log popped in the fire, the only sound in the room.

‘The reality is that love—’ he raised his hands to make quotation marks around the word, ‘—makes people do unforgivable things. Wreak havoc. Ruin lives.’

‘What happened to make you think that?’ she asked with a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach hating the thought of him being hurt, wounded, because there could be no other reason for his stance. And she knew only too well the devastating impact of that.

‘Aside from the front row seat of watching my parents tear each other apart and everything around them? Countless examples.’

‘That’s a terrible thing you lived through but not everyone behaves like that. You realise that don’t you?’ Suddenly it became imperative for her that he understand and although she’d never risk her own heart again, bottom line, she still believed in love.

He puffed out a frustrated breath. ‘We’ve veered completely off topic here.’

‘Have we? Aren’t we still talking about marriage? Yours in particular? You’re the most honourable man I know,’ she said with one hundred percent certainty. ‘Don’t sell yourself short.’

‘I …’ He looked down at her and shook his head.

‘What?’

He closed his eyes and roughly rubbed at the back of his neck.

‘Tell me, Xavier,’ she insisted again and just like that a seismic shift charged through the atmosphere. Moving her feet to keep balance a long-laboured silence settled around them.

‘I don’t feel very honourable right now,’ he finally said with a low growl, snapping open his eyes and taking a step back.

She knew she could move away and pretend she didn’t understand, didn’t feel this too, that she’d misinterpreted the look of desire on his face she was certain reflected hers. She could try and rationalise it, but she didn’t want rational, she wanted this, wanted him.

Still, she didn’t make any move towards him until hunger for him refused to abate, her brother-in-law, a man she’d always respected. She knew then that she’d have to abandon all self-protection and literally take the first step. Moving forward she touched his hand that gripped the mantlepiece. Like a jolt went through him, his whole body jerked, yet he didn’t move away. Instead, his nostrils flared and a band of red raced up his cheekbones.

‘Neither do I,’ she said so low it didn’t sound like her as heat curled through her veins.

He looked into her eyes, searching for something that had her heart slamming against her ribs. ‘Katerina,’ he husked and she’d never heard anything more beautiful as he linked his fingers with hers. ‘You’re so tiny, so strong,’ He stared down at her hand dwarfed by his. ‘And far too young for me.’

‘Never,’ she said with total conviction unable to look away, excitement pounding through her. Without any thought of the repercussions, she took another step forward and he lowered his hands to hold her waist. A sigh of pleasure escaped from her, loving the contact she wanted, needed more of. Standing on tippy toes she pressed a palm over his thumping heart, heat searing through his jacket into her.

His groan ricocheted around the room before slowly he lowered his head.