Page 95 of The Bookshop By the Loch

“Oh, please stop talking like that,” I pleaded. I couldn’t bear the thought of this wonderful woman, with the husky laugh and the cheeky spark in her eyes, not being here anymore.

I eased her wheelchair up to her door and angled it open, so I could push her inside. “So, you’re going to make contact with Corinne?”

Celeste stared out of her room window, fringed with delicate checked curtains. “Yes. I have to, Lexie. I feel like I’ve no other option. I can’t die knowing that she’s out there and doesn’t know that I still think about her every day and that if I could change everything, I would.”

Her profile in her room was shadowy under the summer sun. “There hasn’t been a day that I haven’t thought about her.”

I crouched down beside her. “I understand. It must have been tortuous, having to give up your little girl like that.” I surveyed her downturned mouth and the worry lines feeding out from it. “So, have you thought about how you’re going to make contact with her?”

Celeste nodded with renewed determination. “A letter. I’m going to write to her and ask if she’ll come and see me. She lives on the outskirts of Glasgow.”

I didn’t want to put a downer on Celeste’s plans, but I didn’t want her to get too optimistic either. “What happens if she refuses? Or if she ignores your letter?”

Celeste sat very still. “That’s Corinne’s prerogative. In a way, I wouldn’t blame her. But I have to at least try.” An awkward little blush flashed across her face. “Lexie, would you help me write the letter? I now have an accomplished editor as a friend, so it makes perfect sense to ask you if you would be so kind as to assist me?”

I stood up and smiled down at her. “I’d be honoured to help you write it.”

She attempted to conceal her apprehension. “Excellent. Thank you. That will be another weight off my mind.” She angled her head to one side as she gazed back up at me. “So, onto jollier matters. Now, what’s the story with you and that rather dashing painter?”

My cheeks lit up in furious crimson. “There is no story.”

“If I were you, I’d soon remedy that,” quipped Celeste, whipping off her blanket and tossing it onto her made-up bed with the sparkly cushions. “He’s such a looker. Life is too short, my lovely.”

She glanced around herself, even though she knew there was just the two of us in her room. “Now, before you go, please open that bedside cabinet for me, will you? I’ve got a secret stash of brandy in there. You’re not driving, are you? Good. One for the road then!”

Chapter Thirty

Iarrived at Book Ends the next morning, with my head still stuffed like a pincushion with everything that Celeste had told me last night.

Once I’d placated Celeste by having a glass of brandy with her, I’d made her promise that Flora Simmonds would not be the reason she didn’t make the most of what precious time she still had.

Celeste had then celebrated by knocking back another brandy, drawing disapproving tuts from me.

I had beamed at her, clasping her hand in mine while juggling my brandy. “So, the silver songbird will be back?”

Celeste had pulled a comical face. “I’m more like the Brown Buzzard nowadays.”

Tobias made his entrance at ten o’clock. I wasn’t prepared to tell him anything that Celeste had told me. She had made me promise to keep everything under wraps for now and I wasn’t going to break her trust.

I knew it had taken so much for her to confide in me as it was.

And anyway, it wasn’t like Tobias and me were close. At one time, I had started to think things might have been moving in a different direction, but not now – not after Wine Woman, or his remarks about me being “a good friend” and him keeping his distance. That spoke volumes.

After a couple of phone calls, he gathered his mobile and his jacket, so he could head up to the residential home to see Celeste.

“How are things? With your mum and Trevor?” I asked him.

Tobias pushed a frazzled hand through his hair. He glanced around at his illuminated portraits. “Let’s just say that it’s a bit of a stand-off.” He rubbed at his chin. “I feel like a fraud, Lexie. It’s like I don’t know who I am anymore and that I’ve been living somebody else’s life.”

My heart softened at the sight of him in front of me, so troubled. Shit! Even if he was involved with someone else, it didn’t mean I could switch my feelings off, like a light. I wished I could. “You’re still the same person, Tobias. You just need some time to come to terms with everything. Anyone would’ve been left reeling if they’d been told the same thing you were.”

He managed to locate a faint smile. “Thank you.” He fell quiet for a moment, before shooting me a look from under his sooty lashes. “Do you know how wonderful you are?”

I stiffened. Oh, don’t do this to me. Please. Don’t be nice. I don’t think I can take it.

I angled myself away from him, so he couldn’t see the glistening tears in my eyes. I think I preferred it when he’d been a rude prat. I forced my voice into something which I hoped sounded playful. “I bet you say that to all the bookshop managers.”

Tobias lingered, but the sudden arrival of two teenage boys made him draw up. “Right.” He looked hesitant. “Ok. Better go. See you later.”