Page 82 of A Scottish Highland Hideaway

Ezra folded his arms beside me. “And why do you think that might be?”

I paused as we eased up to the junction that would take us past Flower Power and towards Ezra’s home. “I really don’t know,” I said, then glanced sideways at him. “But thank you for caring. It means a lot.”

“Friendship,” Ezra said. “Genuine friendship, that is. Is worth its weight in gold.”

I smiled. I found this charming, eloquent man so easy to talk to. I still regretted our falling out over Caroline and Laura, which was why I’d decided not to mention them. I didn’t want to rock the boat again so soon after reconciling with him. He knew they were looking for him, and he knew how to get in touch with them. I hoped he would seek out a relationship with them on his own, but ultimately it was up to him.

Our disagreement and subsequent reunion actually seemed to have made our friendship stronger somehow; it had broken down a barrier.

I drew up outside Ezra’s home, noting its manicured lawns that were tipped with frost and the swathes of gold Christmas lights draped around the nearby trees. There were glowing lights from inside too, casting amber pools of light through the mullioned windows.

“Bailey.” Ezra squeezed my hand. “I know we haven’t been acquainted very long, but I feel I have something of the measure of you by now. And I’m not getting out of this car until you tell me what you’ve not been telling me about your handsome journalist.” He gestured to Duxbury Hall. “I’ll sit here all evening if I must. I’ve got nothing and nobody to rush in there for, apart from Mrs Watson and Jackson.”

I switched off the car engine, defeated. “They don’t call you a cantankerous old bugger for nothing, do they.”

His expression was mock outrage. “How dare you,” he said but with an impish gleam in his eyes. “I’m serious, Bailey. Talk to me.”

I fumbled about with my car keys, then sighed and settled back in my seat.

“All right, then. I found out that Zach was dismissed from a newspaper for misconduct.” I examined the branches of the gnarled trees wrapped in lights for a few moments. “I tried to talk to him about it, but he just clammed up.” I shook my head in dismay. “It feels so hypocritical, Ezra. I’m not allowed to have a past, or to keep anything from him, but he’s keeping so much from me. I just want him to feel he can trust me, but maybe there’s too much … dishonesty between us now for that.” I rubbed at the knees of my dark jeans. “As soon as Zach found out I was the ‘runaway aristo’ he’d been chasing, he just wanted to distance himself from me. He seemed so angry … disproportionately angry. Unfairly angry. I didn’t do anything wrong. I was the one who was deceived and conned and left at the altar. I worked so hard to heal, and to start again, and I didn’t want my new life to be tainted by the stain of who I used to be. Yet he’s acting like I was the one who was conning people and stealing their money and breaking their heart.” I stared ahead through the car windscreen at the twisted branches. “I don’t deserve that. At least, I don’t think I do. And now it turns out he’s not being upfront about his own past, yet he’s holding mine against me.”

My shoulders sunk. “Lady Anastasia McLaren-Kerr. I never wanted the bloody title in the first place or what goes with it. It isn’t me. It’s not who I want to be, yet he’s acting like I’ve committed some crime just by being born into this family.” I raised my right hand from the steering wheel and flicked it. “It’s not fair.”

Ezra considered my words in silence for a moment. He appraised his spectacular property out of the passenger side window. Then he looked across at me, his light eyes like shards of glass in the descending dark. “I think you’re wrong. I don’t think he wants to distance himself from you at all.”

“What do you mean?”

Ezra twisted himself round in the passenger seat. “I think Zach’s gone because he’s got feelings for you. You’ve made him doubt himself and his choices.” Ezra’s mouth pressed itself into a sympathetic smile. “Perhaps all this has brought back some painful memories for him and he’s not prepared to make himself … vulnerable … and be hurt for a second time.” Ezra angled his head to one side so that his thick crop of silver hair flopped onto his face. “And if something did happen in his career that he’s still struggling with, then I would say it’s more to do with him than it is with you.”

My heart tightened. “But what am I supposed to do with that if he won’t talk to me?” I rested my head back against the driver’s seat and stared out at the blueberry-black sky. “I wish I’d been able to tell him who I was when Declan began trying to stir things up again, but I just couldn’t.” I gestured out of the driver side window. “I love the life I’ve built for myself here and I just couldn’t face having everything rubbed in my face again. I want the people in my life to like me for me, and for my business to thrive because I’m good at what I do. I actually felt like I was being more honest, because this is who I am and not the title I was born with. But Zach doesn’t see it that way. He only sees my past and my name. I thought, of all people, he would understand.” Hurt rampaged through me. “It’s like as soon as he discovered who I really was, he pushed me away.”

Ezra considered this. “Maybe he understands better than you know, and this is what’s bothering him so much. I think you should keep trying with him, Bailey. His pride is hurt. But he will come round, I’m sure of it. And, remember. He’s a journalist for a gossip magazine, where a story like yours is a gold mine. If he didn’t care about you, he would have thought nothing of writing that story, wouldn’t he?”

“He doesn’t care,” I insisted, but deep down I knew that was a lie. Ezra’s words were forcing me to acknowledge that he might be right.

He’s a good person, my heart told me.

“Maybe,” I said quietly.

“Right-oh, I think we have made some progress.” Ezra opened his door and began to get out of the car. He adjusted his woollen scarf and stooped down with a dramatic flourish that was so much a part of his charismatic presence. “I think you’ll find, young lady, that I am correct on this matter.” His eyes twinkled at me. “Maybe in some sort of twisted fashion, Zach thinks that by leaving you to enjoy your new life without exposing your secrets, he’s showing you exactly how much he cares. How about that?”

He winked and then closed the car door before marching away towards his front door.

Chapter Eighteen

Monday morning dawned with buttery, festive sunlight and a crisp breeze. There had been more snow and a papery layer of it clung to everything.

In the shop, I snatched up my notebook as a distraction from my thoughts of Zach and the conversation with Ezra, forcing myself to try and come up with some new promotional ideas I could introduce into the shop in January when sales would no doubt be thin on the ground.

Amber and Rowan listened, shooting each other concerned glances, as I dislodged any further dissection of Zach’s behaviour and reeled off the ideas I’d come up with, like an over-enthusiastic jack-in-the-box. I hadn’t mustered up the courage to tell them yet about me being Lady Anastasia, though I promised myself I would, when the time was right. I was still too wounded by Zach’s reaction and I wanted to get a handle on my emotions first, before launching myself into another “scenario”.

“What do you think about loyalty cards?” I said. “Every time a customer makes a purchase, we could stamp a card for them and when they’ve made their sixth purchase, they’re entitled to a free bouquet.”

I used my finger to scan down my page of frantic handwriting.

“Or how about a Little Ones Gardening Club? Parents could sign their kids up to it and they can get a packet of seeds and a pot once a quarter. Might encourage the children to get interested in botany from an early age? We could also do monthly social media posts focused on a particular species of flower or a house plant that we have in stock and⁠—”

Amber held up one hand. I noticed her nails were slicked with Christmassy, bottle-green polish infused with glitter.