Page 68 of Journey to the Scottish Highlands

Chapter Thirteen

On the drive back to The Ramblings, I kept thinking about Cayla.

She reminded me so much of myself at her age; full of spiralling hormones and the burning, all-encompassing desire to become an actor, intermingled with the creeping doubt that she might not be good enough and the aftermath of the bullying she too had been through.

I thumped the heel of my hand on the top of my steering wheel in frustration. I hadn’t handled the talk with Cayla at all well. I’d ended up upsetting her and making her think her mum, Josie Hazelwood and I had been gossiping about her. The whole point of me chatting to Cayla had been to encourage her to rethink ditching her acting. Instead I’d made her dig her heels in even more.

I seemed to have a knack for stuffing things up these days. Just look at my own floundering career. Then there was the complication of Evan.

I shoved a stray lock of hair away from my face.

Not that Evan mattered in the long term, I reassured myself. It was just that I’d thought we’d come to some sort of understanding after the Fox incident.

I reached across and clicked on the car radio, which I’d tuned into the local news station, Forrest Bank Today.

As I drove past the shops with their lights twinkling in the late afternoon sunshine, the presenter mentioned the local farmers market taking place at the weekend. ‘And in the meantime, bomb disposal experts are working to finish the sandpit construction in order to be able to safely detonate the two World War Two bombs, which were discovered on Sunday. It’s hoped that this will be completed by the end of the week.’

I groaned at the radio. The end of the week? All I wanted was to get away from Forrest Bank and The Ramblings and get home to Strath Ross and Grandpa before I caused any more damage.

I needed the familiarity; I needed the rugged hillsides, the scattered farmland and the tranquillity.

I switched on Marlene’s engine again and headed further down the lane, sweeping right into The Ramblings. I admired the way the sun splashed against its windows.

I parked, fetched my bag from the passenger seat and locked up.

I was heading towards the entrance when Evan appeared. It looked like he was heading towards his dad’s car.

He spotted me and drew up. ‘Hi.’

‘Hi.’

His gaze melted over me. ‘You had a good day? Thanks for helping Mum with dropping off those fabrics.’

‘No problem.’ Why did he have to be nice? It was worse when he was nice.

Since Leon, I’d been able to shut down that side of my life; ignore it; push it to one side and make my acting take precedence. It had taken time and a lot of soul searching, but I’d got there. At the beginning, I’d thought Leon and I had been destined to be together forever. I’d devoted so much time and energy to our relationship. Underneath it all, I’d known it was me who was putting in the lion’s share of the effort and striving to please him rather than myself. I’d ignored the red flags: Leon’s childish jealousy whenever my acting received a good review; his passive-aggressive comments whenever I was called back for a second audition and he wasn’t.

I swore I’d never repeat that same mistake again, and that relationships and I weren’t compatible.

But now … whenever I saw Evan, or he looked at me, I got all twisted up inside, and it was infuriating. I tried to think about something else or refocus, but I couldn’t untangle myself.

‘What else have you been up to?’ he asked, his T-shirt sleeves rippling in the breeze.

‘Trying to persuade a teenage girl to persist with her acting dreams.’

‘Oh? How did that go?’

‘Don’t ask. Not great.’

Evan’s mouth flipped into a smile. ‘I’m sure you handled it better than you think you did.’

Oh, you’re doing it again, yelled a frustrated voice in my head. You’re being so nice to me. Just stop right now. It isn’t helping. It’s making it worse. I pulled an embarrassed face. ‘I tried to make her see that she shouldn’t give up on what she wants to do just because some spiteful, nasty school bully had tried to convince her she was useless.’ I shook my head in exasperation. ‘And she’s anything but. She’s terrific. She’s got real potential.’

Evan held my gaze with a smile. My chest fluttered.

‘Remember what we were like at that age, Daisy. Tell them to do something, and they’ll do the opposite just for the hell of it.’

I got a waft of his delicious, woody aftershave. ‘Off somewhere nice?’