Page 109 of Sinful Bride

My voice breaks completely, and I bury my face in my hands, sobbing.

"I destroyed everything," I choke out. "I destroyed us. I know you can't forgive me. I know you can't trust me after what I did. But I need you to know I love you. I love you so much, and I'm so sorry."

For a long moment, there's only silence. Then Declan's arms come around me, pulling me against his chest. One hand cradles the back of my head while the other wraps around my waist, holding me tight.

"I forgive you," he says quietly.

I freeze. "What?"

"I forgive you, Elena." His voice is rough with emotion. "I forgive you. And I love you, too."

I pull back to stare at him, not quite believing what I'm hearing. "How can you—after everything I did⁠—"

"Because I understand." He cups my face in both hands, forcing me to look at him. "I understand what it's like to be trapped by expectations. To feel like you have no choice. To make decisions you hate because you can't see any other way out." He lets out a slow breath. “Lachlan gave me his organization, and every day since then, I’ve been terrified of letting my best friend down. Of failing not only the men he entrusted me with and losing everything he worked for, but of disappointing him. He’s like a brother to me, and every misstep I made, all I could think was that he’d realize he’d chosen the wrong person. Or worse, he’d be forced to come back and take over, and it would ruin his marriage. That I’d ruin my life and his by not being good enough.”

He pauses. “And there’s more, too—things that aren’t entirely mine to talk about. But I helped Lachlan get his girl back, after her family did terrible things to her. I know how they can force you into choices that seem impossible, where there are no good options. Where every choice is a betrayal of someone you love. I just… I was so angry and betrayed I didn’t think clearly. And Lachlan helped remind me of it."

"But I still⁠—"

“You came here to tell your father no. You chose me, Elena. Even if it took you a little too long to realize it.”

Fresh tears spill down my cheeks. "I thought I'd lost you."

"You didn't lose me." He leans forward, pressing his forehead against mine. "I was hurt and angry. I felt betrayed. But I never stopped loving you, even when I wished I could."

"Declan—"

"I've seen what happens when people waste time, or lose it," he says quietly. “Lachlan and Adriana lost ten years. I don't want to lose time with you. I don't want to waste what we have because I'm too stubborn to forgive." His hands slide down to my shoulders, cupping around them as he looks into my eyes.

"If you want me, I want you. And I'll choose to trust you. I'll choose to believe in us. Because the alternative is worse than any risk. I love you," he says again. "I love you, Elena. And I'm not letting you go."

Fresh tears roll down my cheeks, and I fall into his arms. "I love you too," I whisper. "I love you so much."

He kisses me, soft and gentle at first, then deeper. His hands move to my waist, pulling me closer, and I go willingly. When we break apart, he smooths his hand over my hair, and I take a deep breath.

“I’m terrified of having children.”

He looks startled. “Elena, you don’t have to explain right now⁠—”

“I want to get this out. While we’re talking about things.” I breathe in and out again. “My mother died having her third child. I was twelve, and she had a hard pregnancy. She bled too much, and she didn’t make it. She⁠—”

Declan's hand tightens on my waist.

"My father told me it was her duty," I say quietly. "That she died doing what she was supposed to do—giving him an heir—and that she failed at that, in the end, because the baby didn’t survive. That she wasn’t strong enough. No one was allowed to talk about her after that. And I knew, even then, that one day it would be my duty too. That I'd be expected to marry someone and have his children, no matter what I wanted. No matter how terrified I was."

My hands are shaking again. Declan takes them in his, holding them steady.

"That's why I panicked," I admit quietly. "That night after the warehouse attack. When we were together. I wanted you to… finish… so badly, but all I could think about was getting pregnant and dying like she did. Leaving behind a child who would grow up without a mother."

"Elena—"

"I know it's part of this life," I say quickly. "I know mafia wives are expected to have children. To produce heirs. And I understand if that's a problem for you. If you need⁠—"

"Stop." His voice is firm but gentle. "Just stop."

I look up at him, my heart pounding.

"You don't have to do anything you don't want to," Declan says. "Not for me. Not for anyone."