Page 29 of The Planetary Systems Preservation Committee Decided We Needed a Nanny

Me: YOU ARE AN IDIOT

It doesn’t make me feel better to send that, but sometimes I do things in the moment that I shouldn’t.

On the plus side, I’m not still shaking from the Vera-induced terror.

I make sure my towel is secure around my waist and go to my kitchen, where I pull out everything that feels good enough to eat right now, and I line it all up on my counter. I open every jar, grab more forks and spoons than one person needs to dirty in one meal, and then I stand there for an hour, munching on my favorite foods, drinking myself into a happy little buzz, and ignoring the drama of the world out there. If I have to keep up with the happenings out there in the world, then our alien nannies aren’t doing a good enough job protecting us, and that’s not what I signed up for. I’m going to be a toddler, happily oblivious for at least the next… I check the time… seventeen hours before I have to go confront my trauma with a psychologist.

Fifty hours until Lora wakes up.

***

I wake up with a scream in my throat, soaking wet with sweat, and…

I rush to the bathroom before I pee my pants, barely making it to the toilet before I start losing it.

Fuck.

I might never forgive Vera. Well, my body might never forgive her.

I finish emptying my bladder, wash my hands, and head back to my bedroom, where the closet calls to me as soon as I step across the threshold. I press my lips into a line, deciding whether it’s a good idea.

“Fuck it,” I whisper to myself, grabbing my blanket and pillow and taking them into the closet. “Sorry if this is a violation of your culture and privacy, but Vera scared the shit out of me, and my dreams are nightmares. I damn near peed my pants just now, and that’s after she literally scared the piss out of me,” I explain to the sleeping alien as I lay my pillow beside him and make a little cot out of my blanket.

I lay on my side, curl into his stiff body, and lay a hand across his chest. “Sorry. I just need to not be alone right now,” I whisper.

Lora doesn’t so much as twitch, but I still feel safer than I did in my own bed.

CHAPTER NINETEEN

Who has a countdown timer on his phone? Not me. I definitely did not call my cousin and demand she tell me exactly how long it will be until Lora wakes up. I didn’t take that information and start a countdown on my phone. And I’ve definitely not been making my daily contributions to the cleanliness of the hospital from the comfort of my closet.

There’s a text message from the empire on my phone letting me know that my new supervisor’s name is GregariousRoughUsefulBountiful…

I don’t know if I want to meet Grub all alone, and Lora’s due for waking today, so I text Grub to let them know that I’ll be in later today or tomorrow depending on how Lora’s waking goes. He still looks absolutely dead, and as weird as it is to be in the same space as what looks like a dead body, I’ve slept in my closet with him instead of on my new bed the last two nights because it feel safer in here with him than it does out there where the body snatchers are.

This has nothing to do with Vera scaring the piss out of me. I won’t die on this hill, but I’ll give it a good fight before I surrender it, just saying.

The countdown timer says I have about ten minutes, and my heart is starting to beat erratically in my chest. I’m not sure if I should be here when he wakes up or if I should be out there just in case. “Lora, I know you’re going to wake up soon, and I just want to let you know, I’ve been keeping you company because shit out there is terrifying and in here with you is less so. I won’t tell this to you because admitting that I’m scared to go to my contribution is weak, but I’m going to say it aloud right now so that I feel less guilty about being in the closet with you while you’re dead asleep. Also, I’ve just been working from here, so don’t worry, I’ve been contributing, and I have a new psychologist, and I’ve been to all of my appointments.”

Just to make sure my words are as accurate as possible, I send a few instructions to the schedule of the AI bots cleaning the maternity ward right now.

“Plus, I don’t think I want to meet a person whose name becomes Grub when acronymized—yes I made that word up. Grub is—actually, you know what? I don’t think I know what a grub is. Is it a worm? A caterpillar? My only exposure to the word is Disney’s Lion King when Timon and Pumba teach what's his name to eat grubs instead of meat. Huh. I think maybe public education has failed me.”

I’m going to have to look this up. Because: grubs. What the heck are they?

I’m leaning against a huge Squishmallow pillow thing in the shape of a gold fish (it’s actually a koi), and Lora’s head is next to my knee which I’ve crossed as I work on the tablet that controls the AI bots that clean the hospital. Control is such a weird word for what’s actually happening. I send them commands, and they do them, but these bots actually have the choice to ignore my instructions. They’re thinking things, and according to the empire’s manual of operations, they actually have some rights and responsibilities in the laws of the empire. Like, they don’t want contribution credits and mandatory rest breaks. Instead they want access to every scrap of new data gathered from non-empire societies. They want to learn everything possible. It’s kind of cool that they accept this as the payment of their job, and that their benefits package includes unlimited power and regular maintenance. Their health benefits are just as good as mine are, and I get free healthcare now that the empire has taken over.

Lora shoots up, moving into a vertical stance faster than I can process. He goes from dead asleep to standing with a bladed weapon in hand and pointed at me in a matter of a second maybe? Then his weapon disappears like it never existed at all, and he smiles at me with closed lips, not showing those incredibly sharp teeth like he knows I need to not see them right away. “My Ollie, you’ve had a difficult time without me. Vera should have been more careful with your psyche.”

Holy shit. He knows? “How do you know that?” I ask as he crouches and gathers me into his arms like I weigh nothing at all. I fucking love feeling like a miniature person in his embrace. Who knew I’d love this so much?

“I heard you while I was in my… deep healing slumber. My body may not respond, but I am aware of everything happening around me. This is why our rest periods are private. We would be aware of any enemy coming in and killing us. It is an anathema to our people to die in our rest and a taboo to violate the sanctity of a person’s resting space.”

“That sounds horrible. I’m sorry that I violated your space,” I apologize, feeling immediately guilty for joining him in the closet when it’s such a huge taboo.

“It was very disturbing when you joined me, but when you explained why, I felt glad that you would find your comfort in me. You are welcome to enter my resting space if you have need of my body,” he says as he walks out of the closet with me—to the bathroom?

“Why are you taking me to the bathroom?” I asked, hoping this isn’t him keeping me close while he takes care of whatever passes as waste for him.