Page 24 of Lovestrung

“Oh, come on. He stayed the night. There has to have happened something.”

“Honestly, there didn’t.”

The disappointment on her face almost matched mine.

“Bummer,” she sighed. “But wait, you never did tell me exactly what happened five years ago.”

I cringed at the memory.

“There’s not much to tell,” I mused and looked out the window. “Max held a party on his twenty-first birthday, I got drunk – first and only time that’s happened – and Ethan and I danced. I tried to kiss him, he told me I was like a sister to him, and that was that.”

“Ouch.” Ella grimaced. “Really, that’s all?”

I blinked at her. “That’s all? Ella, I was mortified! Still am to this day.”

That earned me another eye-roll.

“Look, I get it, you were eighteen, you’d had a crush on him for years, and it must’ve hurt when he turned you away. But it’s been five years, Pippa. You’re both older, wiser –”

“Well, he seems to be,” I muttered, annoyed and still a little embarrassed about the epiphany I’d just had.

“And has it ever occurred to you,” Ella kept talking all over me, “that the reason you haven’t seen him the past year is because he’s starting to see you as more than a sister?”

“No,” I scoffed.

“Why not?”

“Because he said it himself, Ella.” I rubbed my eyes, suddenly exhausted all over again.

“What?” she asked.

I lowered my voice, not wanting anyone to eavesdrop on us. Though given the way people around me gave us the side eyes, that wish was probably a lost cause.

“He told me last night that he couldn’t tell me why he’d stayed away, only that it had nothing to do with my stupid attempt at seducing him.”

She looked crestfallen as I beat her theory to shambles.

“Aww, damn it. I thought I had him all figured out.”

I shuffled my feet.

“Ethan is good at hiding his true feelings. He always has been.”

She took another sip of her coffee and wrinkled her nose.

“Even when you were children?”

I nodded. “Yep. I spoke with my mom about it once or twice, and a lot of foster children maintain a wall of sorts for many years. It’s a defense mechanism.”

Her eyes turned confused once more.

“Even when they’ve left the toxic environment they’ve escaped?”

“Yeah. It’s sad, but with Ethan, I discovered early on that not asking questions and waiting for him to tell me things of his own will instead was much more successful.” I shrugged. “I think I’ll just have to wait him out again. And who knows? Now that he’s back in my life, he might end up surprising me.”

“Ugh, I hate cryptic guys,” Ella huffed. “All that Look at me, I’m all broody and mysterious is starting to piss me off.”

I chuckled. “Sadly, I don’t think that part of the male psyche is going to change any time soon.”