Page 55 of Return to Wildsyde

Luella turned to see Lady Helena watching her closely.

Blushing, Luella shook her head, dismayed in case the woman believed she was ungrateful for all the kind attentions she had been so generously given over the past week.

“Nothing,” she protested. “I’ve had a wonderful day. It’s all been a glorious dream since the moment your son arrived on the doorstep of Wildsyde.”

Helena nodded. “Yes, the place you were running away from with only a carpetbag and without so much as a farthing in your pocket. Won’t you tell me what happened? I promise you may trust me.”

Luella shook her head and turned to look out of the window, feeling the colour drain from her face. She suspected she could trust the lady, but she did not dare do so. Even if she didn’t say a word to anyone, surely a lady like Helena would think less of her for her wanton behaviour. There were enough people thinking ill of her to want to add another to the list. Besides, she would do nothing to cause Lyall any further embarrassment, no matter if he deserved it. He’d been badly burned by Lilith and his reaction was hardly to be wondered at, no matter how unjust it had been.

“Lady Morven is one of my closest friends, did you know that?”

Luella’s head snapped around, her eyes wide with alarm as she stared at Lady Helena.

“Oh, don’t look so horrified,” she said, laughing softly. “She only had lovely things to say about you, though she admitted it took her some time to believe you were not like your cousin.”

“She believes it now?” Luella asked, her heart thudding too hard.

“She does.”

Luella licked her lips, hardly daring to ask, but she had to know. “But when did you speak to her last?”

“I received a letter from her this morning. I wrote to tell her you were with us, you see. In case she was worried as you disappeared from her son’s house so precipitously. She wants to know ‘what the devil that fool boy has done now.’ Her words, not mine.”

Luella gave a little bark of startled laughter, alarmed to find tears welling in her eyes, but the relief was enormous. She could not bear the idea Lady Morven and Mrs Baillie despised her and believed she had tried to trap Lyall for mercenary reasons.

“What did he do, love?” Helena asked, reaching for her hand.

It was too much. The misery Luella had been holding so tightly in check burst forth in the light of Lady Helena’s sympathy. Luella pressed a hand to her mouth to muffle the broken sound that tore from her, but there was no helping it. The tears rolled down her cheeks as she gave in, agonising sobs wracking her frame as Helena gathered her into an embrace and pressed a handkerchief into her hands.

“Oh, you poor dear. That’s it, you have a good cry. You’ll feel better for it, I promise. Once you feel able, you can tell me all about it, and I promise you I won’t tell another living soul. Not even Lady Morven, though I suspect from what she wrote, she may have a fair idea.”

Helena made soothing noises, rubbing circles on Luella’s back as though she were a little girl with a grazed knee. Little by little, Luella brought herself back under control.

“I’m so sorry,” she said thickly, wiping her eyes. She blew her nose. “Good heavens, what must you think of me? And after you’ve been so kind. I ought not to have made such a scene.”

“Oh, piffle,” Helena said crossly. “Whyever not? I don’t know why people set so much store by keeping one’s emotions so tightly battered down. I certainly don’t. I’ve got a frightful temper,” she added confidingly.

Luella gave her a dubious look, and Helena smiled.

“It’s true. Just ask Mr Knight. Are you terribly in love with him? Lord Buchanan, I mean, not my husband.”

Blinking in shock at the sudden question, Luella could only stare at her for a moment. “In l-love?”

“Yes, dear. Are you in love with Lyall? I wouldn’t blame you if you were. The strong silent types are terribly appealing, aren’t they? Especially if they’re wounded or emotionally damaged in some way. Quite irresistible. Added to the whole rugged Highlander thing and, oh, the kilt… well, a girl doesn’t stand a chance,” she said with a wistful sigh.

Despite everything, Luella gave a choked laugh, and Helena returned a mischievous grin. “Don’t tell Mr Knight I said so, he’s the jealous type. Not that he has any need to be. I love him as much now as when I first laid eyes on him. Far more in truth. But sometimes men are terribly obtuse. I had to chase him down, you know. I was quite shameless about it. The poor darling didn’t stand a chance.”

“You chased Mr Knight?” Luella repeated, for Lady Helena was the beautiful daughter of a duke and could surely have had anyone with a snap of her fingers. The idea Mr Knight might have needed persuading was interesting.

Helena nodded. “He had some mad notion about not being good enough for me, not being a blue-blooded aristocrat. Good heavens, as if I cared a button for such snobbery.”

“Lyall thinks I tried to trap him, just like Lilith did,” Luella said in a rush, her throat tightening as she remembered once again how hurt and furious he’d looked, staring down at her. Shame and misery fought for domination in her chest. “We… we were found in a rather compromising position.”

“You didn’t, though, because you’re in love with him,” Helena guessed.

Luella nodded, deciding to throw caution to the wind. “I knew he would not offer marriage or… or anything. I was just so tired of wanting what I couldn’t have, and he wanted me and…” She broke off, not daring to look at Lady Helena now. “You must think me immoral. I suppose I got what I deserved. If I’d behaved like a lady—”

“Oh, to the devil with being a lady,” Helena snapped. “Don’t be such a fool, Luella. You love and desire the man. Why shouldn’t you express those feelings? And, if he thinks less of you for doing so, it’s him that ought to feel ashamed, and so I shall tell him.”