Page 32 of Clever Deceit

I wondered suddenly if I should add a restraining order to my list of things to do. If I actually had one of those, would it make me more believable? Or had it been too long for me to be able to do that? Could I do one now based on what Tony had been doing since I'd gotten back in town?

Could I say I was worried about what he might do and get a restraining order based on that?

I'd never even thought of it, but now the idea was growing in my head, and I was starting to think it could be the right next move. We had no idea what Mark and Tony had planned, but they'd already done a bunch of things that were definitely not okay. Assaulting me in the street at the bakery. Barging into my home. Setting Warren's home on fire. No, I didn't have any proof that that had been Tony, but he had tried to kidnap me right after that.

Surely that justified getting a restraining order to keep him away from me.

I paused on that thought, savoring it for a moment. A life without Tony hanging over my shoulder. A life where he wasn't allowed to get near me or talk to me. Where he couldn't threaten me in the street outside our bakery—or inside it, for that matter—or bang on my door or leave dead squirrels or try to burn the place down around my ears.

Damn, it sounded good. It sounded like I'd be able to breathe for the first time since I got back.

It also sounded like something he wouldn't obey. Had he actually paid any attention to it with this first woman? It was hard to believe, with the way he had treated me, that he would give me any kind of break just because of a silly little thing like a restraining order. He had always mocked me about being unable to speak up for myself, but I could see now that was just a way to crush me down so I would never dare argue with him.

And something that might actually put me in even more danger.

The problem was, he'd inevitably find out if I did anything like that. Surely someone would have to let him know about said restraining order—how else would he follow the rules?—and the moment they did, he'd come after me. He wouldn't give one single damn about the restraining order itself. Why should he, when the police department in this town was on his side? He'd only care that I'd stepped out of line and taken one out and filed a police report to boot. He'd be furious that I'd outed him and turned against him, especially when he'd made it so clear that he wanted to get back with me.

The thought of that now made me shudder. Back then, I had been so naïve—I had believed that being with someone like him, someone who treated me the way he did, was something I deserved. Something I could fix. Something I needed to stick out, since I was sure there was some good in him somewhere in there.

But since I had been with Warren, I could see how wrong I was. I could see how I had deluded myself into believing that just to survive—because if I had faced up to how bad things really were, I would have had to accept that my life was a nightmare, and I didn’t know if I had any way out of it.

Warren, though? When Warren looked at me, it wasn’t with the distaste and disgust that Tony had. For our whole relationship, Tony had always treated me as though I had something to prove to him—as though I should have been so grateful for him even gracing me with the time of day, and that if I wasn’t appropriately glad, he would make me pay. But Warren told me he was proud of me. Told me how much he respected me. And I could see now that this was the kind of relationship I had been craving all along.

But I had dragged him into all of this with Tony, and I couldn’t forgive myself for that.

He'd come after me with renewed force if he found out I'd done something like that. And we were in a town where the cops ignored anything he did wrong and probably helped him do some things. I would have no recourse if he did come after me. They'd just laugh at me if I called them to come save me. Even if they knew I had a restraining order.

The thought was why I felt like I was drowning as well as flying. Frank might be able to get my report to another precinct, but what good would it do me if the police force in my own back yard was looking out for Tony and Mark rather than girls like me? They wouldn't protect me. Hell, they'd probably turn me over to him if they had half a chance!

Filing that police report might actually be a very bad idea, because it would give Tony a reason to come after me.

I wondered suddenly whether that was what had happened to the girl who had pursued a restraining order. Had she gone out of her way to file a police report, get someone to take her seriously, and get a restraining order only for someone to tell Tony she'd done all that? Had he ignored the rules and gone after her the minute he found out?

Had he and his father covered up whatever they'd done to her?

I gulped and looked around the room I was sitting in, staring into the shadows in the corners and wondering what might be lurking there.

Then I shook myself and tried to talk some sense into my anxiety. I was in my own house, where I was completely safe. Warren was here to protect me, and if anything happened to him, I had zero doubts that Silver would take care of anyone who came through my door without permission.

But I'd also thought I was safe in Warren's house. And right now, it was a pile of smoldering ashes.

At that moment, the man in question strolled into the room, his eyes on his phone and his fingers clicking away. When he looked up and saw me no doubt looking panicked, he frowned.

“What's wrong?” he asked, making his way quickly to my side.

I'm not ashamed to say I flung myself into his arms. Since we’d gotten home, I'd put myself through the wringer when it came to emotions, and now I'd talked myself into being well and truly panicked at the lack of options in front of me. I wanted his arms around me and his comforting voice to tell me everything was going to be okay. I wanted to hear that he had a plan and that he was going to make sure Tony couldn't get his hands on me.

It wasn't strong. In fact, thinking something like that made me feel slightly ashamed of myself. But Warren was the strongest, steadiest person I'd ever met, and right now, when I was frightened, I couldn't think of anything better than feeling like he had an answer to what was going on.

He guided me slowly to the couch, where he pulled me down and wrapped me in his arms. I cuddled into him, letting his warmth seep into my body and make me feel better. And when I finally pulled back to look him in the eye, I was feeling at least a bit steadier.

“Want to talk about it?” he asked gently.

I sniffed, straightened my spine, and then nodded. “It's about Frank.”

His face cleared like he knew exactly what I was going to say, and he nodded once. “You've been thinking about his offer.”

“More or less. And I'm not sure we can take him up on it.”