Page 37 of Honest Neglect

“What do you mean?” I sniffed.

“You think I don’t want to be there for you while you work through all of this?” he asked me. I shook my head.

“Warren, you don’t know how bad it is—”

“Yes, I do,” he replied. “I know how bad it can get. I know how it feels to have the life you thought you were going to live ripped away from you, I know that all too well. But just because that happened doesn’t mean you have to give up on everything you’ve ever wanted. You don’t have to give up on your life in Oakville, or...or on us.”

The way he spoke, there was such a fervent certainty to his voice that I almost believed him. And I knew he had been through hell, with what had happened to him in the military, but he had done so much work to get himself back on his feet before the two of us had even met. I was working from the ground up, trying to do the work I needed while the monsters who hurt me were still out there. It felt impossible.

“I don’t want to drag you down with me,” I whispered. “You’ve already been through so much because of me...”

“And I’m still here,” he pointed out. “I chose to still be here, Lily. I chose to protect you and your mom, to stay here with you. Why do you think I’m doing all of this? I don’t just want revenge on Mark and Tony; I want you to be able to get on with your life. I want you to be able to heal, no matter how long that takes, no matter what it looks like. And I want to be there with you when you do.”

The emotion in me shifted slightly when I heard him saying that. I wanted to believe him. I wanted to.

“I love you, Lily,” he told me fiercely, and he planted his lips against mine. “I love you so much. You’ve survived more than most people would have been able to, and the person you are on the other side of that—she’s amazing. She’s kind, she’s loving, she’s smart, she’s funny, and she’s the person I want to be with. I want a future with you, no matter what that looks like, because I know the person you are underneath all of this. And I think you’re incredible.”

He kissed me again, harder this time, and I kissed him back. I didn’t have the words to express just how much that meant to be, but I could show him. The shock of adrenaline at seeing Tony again seemed to have started to shift into another energy, something far more thrilling.

I drew him down onto the bed next to me, wrapping my arms around him and trying to forget about everything that lay outside this door. Because it didn’t matter, not right now—no, what mattered was the feel of us together like this, those precious words he had just spoken to me. He had told me that what we had went beyond just love; it was more profound than that. He wanted a future with me, no matter what kind of mess I happened to be, and I was beyond grateful for that.

Beyond grateful that the universe had finally gifted me with a man who made my future exciting, instead of making me wonder if my life was worth living.

He pushed the hem of my skirt up and pulled down my panties, grabbing my thigh and shifting it so it was draped over him. I could feel his hardness against me as our tongues came together once more, and a deep need burned in my belly, a need I knew wouldn’t be satisfied by anything other than him.

“I love you,” he murmured against my lips again, as though making sure I really believed it. I pushed my hand into his hair, pulling back to look into his eyes.

“I love you too,” I told him, and I reached down to his pants, brushing my fingers over the front of his jeans so I could feel his hardness again. I found the zipper and tugged it down, slipping my fingers into his boxers and pulling free his erection so that it lay across the inside of my thigh.

He slid his hand to the outside of my thigh, pulling me over so I was even closer to him as we lay side by side. Our legs tangled together, he slowly moved forward, planting his cock at the entrance to my pussy as he gazed into my eyes.

I pushed myself down on him in the same moment he thrust up, and both of us let out a moan of pleasure as we came together for the first time. I would never get over how good the two of us felt when we were like this, as though the whole world had fallen silent for a moment and we could just give ourselves over to each other. He brushed his lips against mine again, and I inhaled his breath, letting myself get lost to it. I wanted to consume every part of him with every sense I could, touch him and taste him and smell him and feel him, lose myself to him until we were the only two people who mattered in the entire world.

He moved his hand to the small of my back and began to slide in deeper, deeper, thrusting up into me until there was virtually no space between us at all. I could feel my eyes starting to grow hazy as he fucked me, the soft light pouring in through the window picking out the sharp angles on his face. I needed this, more than I could put into words—I needed him in ways I wasn’t sure I would ever be able to fully understand.

But he needed me just the same way, and that was what I had to keep reminding myself of. He wasn’t here because he had to be or because he felt some duty to me—he was here because he wanted me, because he loved me. I hooked my leg around him and pulled him even nearer now, needing more, needing it all—needing every part of him.

Our lips crashed together once more, his tongue slipping deep into my mouth, and I felt the pleasure starting to boil to a fever pitch between my legs. The orgasm was already cresting, the emotion and intensity of the last hour forgotten when I was with him. This was what I wanted, what I needed—this was the man I would always desire, even if sometimes I felt as though I didn’t deserve him.

As we kissed each other hard, he pushed up into me one last time and held himself there. A split second later, I felt the flood of his seed as he filled me, his cock throbbing deep inside of me. I clenched my thighs, squeezing him in even closer and listening to the low moan of pleasure he let out as he reached his release.

And it was the feel of him finishing inside of me that took me over the edge and into my own orgasm, the sensation of it tingling from between my thighs and sending a warm energy rushing through my nerve endings. I let out a deep breath I didn’t know I had been holding. It seemed to contain so much more than just the contents of my lungs, too—it felt as though I was letting go of everything, all the doubt and worry in my mind, all the questions that I’d had about whether or not he would really want to stay when this was all over.

He didn’t move his mouth from mine as I came, tongue tracing out wordless sentences against my lips. I trailed my hand down the back of his neck, feeling the softness of the hair at his nape.

And as the light dappled over the two of us, for a moment, I forgot about everything else. I forgot about Tony and Mark and the fact they were refusing to give up. I forgot about what had happened to Silver, to Warren, to me.

And I thought only of the man in front of me, who loved me enough to see me through all of it.

Chapter Twenty-Two

Warren

––––––––

LEROY SANK DOWN INTO the chair opposite me and let out a sigh. At times like this, I was reminded of just how old he was—how much of a life he had lived, and how much strength it must have taken to get involved with something like this.

But more than anything, I was excited. So damn excited. Leroy had just arrived back from the police station, and he had filled us in on everything that had happened there. Frank had arrested Tony and thrown him in prison, and then shown a few of the cops in the station the video Barry had taken of him. It seemed to be enough to get a few of them to re-think their position on standing with the McCarthys. I guessed they were only willing to look away from so much before their good sense got the better of them, and a murder took it further than they could ever have imagined.