Page 45 of Passion in Bloom

He’s not—

He’s...

I couldn’t finish the thoughts. Comparing him to my ex was stupid, but the idea pushed through my lust-dazed mind. The last time I’d had sex was with David, and even though it was past time to replace those memories with something new, I stumbled over the significance of what I was doing here.

I wasn’t David’s. I broke up with him several times, but I’d convinced myself that the breakup had to stick, finally, when I left Chicago and ran from him. When I hid from him, I’d severed the tie between us.

But I wasn’t set on becoming Roarke’s either. I couldn’t trust that he’d let me live my life as I wanted to. I wasn’t sold on this illusion that a man could be with me and not own me.

What was happening between us now was an explosion of lust. A break of desire. The tension and buildup snapping as we gave way to needing this release together. It was just physical, or I thought it was.

“Heather,” he murmured, somehow sensing that he was losing me.

I furrowed my brow, making eye contact again.

“I’m sure,” I said, worrying that he would interpret my hesitation as a sign that I was changing my mind.

He nodded, cupping my cheek and pulling me in for a long kiss. I rose onto my knees, meeting him in the middle. With his height over me, him standing and me on the bed, I felt like he was too damn far away. My leggings and panties stayed bunched at one of my ankles, but I ignored it, focusing on the press of his lips to mine.

“I’m sure too,” he said. “But we can wait—” I reached up to loop my arms around his neck, needing to banish that idea from his mouth, from his mind.

I didn’t want to wait. The suggestion of pure pleasure that he offered me was too good of a thing to pass up on. I knew how good he could make me feel. He had, with his mouth and fingers. And I wanted it again. I sought that ecstasy and release from having to think and worry.

“I can’t wait,” I argued.

Day and night, I struggled with thoughts of him. For every minute I wasted damning David’s return to my life, I concentrated twice as many more on wondering if Roarke really was different than David. That I could move forward not just on my own, but with him near and mattering to some extent too. I would be gun shy about entering a relationship. No one could blame me for that, but with this rugged ranch hand, his calloused fingers caressing me and erasing the pain of my past, I so desperately wanted to put my faith in him.

“I don’t want to wait,” I said, not caring if I sounded like I was begging and pleading. “I want you,” I concluded, pressing my brow to his and holding my breath that these words were the ones he needed to hear. That he would believe them.

“Then stay with me, gorgeous.” He leaned back to frame my face, piercing me with his green stare until I could feel the sincerity of his desire and hear the seriousness in his voice. “You stay right here in this moment.”

I nodded, then tilted my head to the side to give him access to laying more of those lazy, sensual kisses down my jaw and neck.

“I want to,” I replied, threading my fingers through his hair as he gathered his arms around me tighter, pulling me into a hug.

Once he held me flush to him, he lifted me off the bed. With my leg dangling in the air, my leggings and panties fell free to the floor. By the time that I wrapped my limbs around him, legs at his waist, my arms in a tight circle around his neck, he turned and sat on the edge of the bed.

Seated, he could reach for his nightstand. I clung to him with one arm, kissing him faster as I stroked that big erection standing between us. It was right there. So hard and pointing at my, and so very near my pussy.

As I pumped my hand over him, he growled into my mouth, struggling to open the package to the condom he’d retrieved. Then once he sheathed himself, he slipped his fingers toward me.

“No.” I shook my head, not in the mood for any more foreplay. Just being near him and breathing the same air turned me on somehow. His proximity was all it took to arouse me.

I didn’t have the patience to let him stretch me with his fingers. I didn’t want the delay of him trying to get me off before he entered me.

I couldn’t wait.

And I didn’t.

Before he could frown at me, likely assuming I was changing my mind or hesitating, I lifted up on my knees and reached low to angle his dick to my entrance.

“I told you,” I uttered around panted breaths. “I don’t want to wait.”

Then in one swift dip down, I sank onto his long erection, groaning at the stretch.

My pussy tingled. My breasts felt so heavy and achy with desire. Deep down, my uterus clenched with need. Through all my veins, desire pumped like molten lava. At the tip of every nerve ending, I felt shocked and buzzed from the pure pleasure of being stuffed with his cock inside me.

He slid in, slowly but surely, as I lowered over him. I didn’t stop, dropping until I sucked in every inch of him.