Page 73 of Passion in Bloom

Chapter 25

Heather

The second the doorclosed after Roarke, I winced. It didn’t feel right to kick him out. I didn’t want to. Just when I was embracing how good it felt to let him into my life and let him in my space, I had to react with a fight-or-flight sort of instinct to make my space safe again.

Safe meant alone.

Nevaeh was the only person who could’ve had access to my laptop. The only one.

I wasn’t accusing her for the hell of it. She was the only person who I could think of having the chance to get onto my laptop.

But how?

It was password protected. I was careful with security, not just because I cared about doing my job to the best of my ability but also because I didn’t want to let anything bad happen with something trusted to me. It was another residual effect of my childhood. Being automatically assumed to be a cheat, mooch, or liar didn’t sit well with me at all and I strove to avoid anyone having any ammunition to put those labels on me ever again. Some people did good and were obedient because it was the right thing to do, but it was something deeper for me. I—still—wanted to erase the stigma of my past that my parents left me to deal with.

Does she have experience with hacking? Some kind of skill with computers to unlock them another way? I wasn’t an expert at all things related to technology, but I wasn’t a Luddite or moron either. Whoever got onto my laptop, whenever they had, they’d done so without permission. They’d forced their way to the docs.

Could it be something random? A hack from somewhere far away? A glitch?

I paced for a long time, letting these frantic thoughts and what-ifs consume me. When I didn’t get carried away with worries and panicking, I fell back to regretting how I’d treated Roarke.

He had to have gone to that other cabin that Todd offered to him. He got the key then and there when Todd came to his flooded cabin.

But I couldn’t afford the time or energy to worry about Roarke. It wasn’t fair to kick him out just to have privacy to freak out about this issue. Whatever his niece did wasn’t a reflection on his behavior. If I was ready to judge him for Nevaeh’s actions, then that would’ve made me no better than all the judgmental and closed-minded people in town who’d considered me an outcast and good-for-nothing kid just because of who my parents were.

That wasn’t what prompted me to kick him out. It was how it seemed like he wanted to defend her. Almost as though he’d try to gaslight me that I had to be wrong, that I had to be perceiving things incorrectly.

But I wasn’t. Nothing could change the facts that Nevaeh was the only person near my work laptop without my supervision.

In the morning, when I drove to the bank, I frowned at the exterior light on at the other cabin that Roarke must have taken. He’d probably left it on by accident when he headed into work, and I hated the sliver of guilt that hit me at making him leave. Just when it seemed like we were getting closer together, I had to retreat like that.

No. No worrying about him. I had to focus on my job, and I as I steered my car over the bumpy road to the highway, I cringed and winced, frantic that I’d be fired. That my job was toast. That this new opportunity for another, better job, would be gone now.

I wasn’t trying to get rich. I didn’t have lofty goals to be wealthy. I was determined to recoup all that David had taken from me. It would take a long time, but I was certain that working hard and consistently would get me saving up quickly. I’d never been a spender, never having much with the way my parents were. By moving back to Burton, having few expenses and keeping a simple life, I’d be able to get ahead again with a savings. I’d be able to feel financially secure, independently secure, for once in my life.

And now, those dreams were threatened.

“This is what I get for helping someone,” I muttered. I already had twisted opinions on getting or giving help.

“I get screwed,” I said before I parked in the lot.

Epically screwed.

When I headed inside and saw Janelle, though, she tried to quickly and firmly dissuade me from doomsday thoughts like that.

“No, Heather. Not at all. No one is getting fired. Or disciplined. Or anything.” She held me gently, her hands on my upper arms and she lowered to get more to my eye level. Looking me straight in the eye, she spoke calmly and confidently, almost smiling and not appearing harsh or annoyed.

“Your job is fine, Heather. I’m the one who determines the terms of employment at this branch. Believe me when I say I believe you. I have faith in you.”

I whooshed out a long, deep breath of relief.

Nance and Fergus, who’d arrived right after me, chimed in.

“Everyone makes mistakes,” Fergus repeated.

“And if this isn’t a mistake but an intentional action, then we all know you wouldn’t have done it,” Nance added.

Their words made me feel better, but I’d be much calmer and saner if I knew what had happened in the first place. That was how stubbornly I didn’t want any blame placed on me. That was how fiercely I wanted to defend myself from a bad reputation. I’d grown up with a falsely bad one for too long to want to relive that experience.