Page 47 of The Cowboy’s Forever Promise

“Have you told her how you feel about her?” June asked.

Stroking George’s head, he shook his head. “I have no idea what this craziness inside me is. I love being with her, she makes everything better, you know? But how do I know what I feel isn’t going to change tomorrow or next week or next month?”

“Unfortunately, that is something you have to figure out yourself. I can’t help you with that. Ask yourself what life would look like without Abby in it.”

As Carson drove back to his house minutes later, June’s words replayed over and over in his mind. What would life look like without Abby?

As he parked in front of his house, George barked excitedly, and when Carson opened his door, the puppy just about flew out of the truck and raced toward the front door.

“She’s not here, buddy. It’s just you and me.”

George wasn’t listening though and when Carson unlocked the door, he rushed inside with a yelp and sniffing, ran in the direction of the bedroom.

Sighing, Carson, closed the door behind him. It was a different house than the one he’d brought Abby to the first time. There were no unwashed dishes or laundry lying around. The kitchen was tidy, everything put away in those fancy boxes she’d bought and put in every closet and kitchen cabinet.

The living room was also tidy, not one thing out of place. On the coffee table was still a vase with the last of the wildflowers of the season she’d picked the other day.

He found George on the bed in the bedroom, lying on the pillow Abby had used, looking forlorn. Stroking his head, he had to swallow a few times before he could talk. “I miss her, too, George.”

She’d put fresh sheets on the bed and tidied the room. When he opened the doors of his closet, he saw that all his laundry was neatly folded and put away.

Dropping his head, he tried to inhale, but the tight band that had formed around his chest, made it difficult. There was still a whiff of her scent in the room.

His phoned pinged. It was a text from Abby.

I couldn’t say goodbye. Thank you for everything.

She’d ended off her text with a blue heart. Why blue? What the hell did that even mean?

Opening a search engine, he asked what a blue heart represents. Within seconds he had his answer.

The blue heart emoji can have different meanings depending on the context. It is commonly associated with loyalty, trust, and friendship. It can also represent calmness and tranquility.

Friendship? Calmness? Tranquility? Damn it to hell!

There was nothing calm or tranquil about their lovemaking last night. And hell, now he was a friend? They’d made love all night long. All. Night. Long. Passionately, desperately and she’d been with him every step of the way. He’d never had anyone respond to him like she did. They were so tuned in to one another’s need, words weren’t necessary and she sent him a freaking blue heart?

Fed up, he stormed out. “Come on, George!” he called. “We’re going to breakfast.”

This craziness was going to end right this minute. It was time to move on. She’d left. Sent him blue heart. He got the message.

*

It was nearly eight o’clock in the evening by the time Abby opened the door of her tiny apartment. She was cold and hungry and tired and where her heart was supposed to be, was only a huge emptiness she was afraid would never fill up again. All she wanted to do was pull a blanket over her head and cry ugly tears.

She’d learned a long time ago though, that crying didn’t fix anything. Her face got red and swollen, she’d be left with puffy eyes and a headache, but it didn’t make her feel any better or change anything.

It had been a long, tiring day as she’d driven dry-eyed for about fourteen hours all the way from Livingston to Seattle. She’d stopped for gas along the way, but had made a point of not doing it in Spokane.

It was difficult and her heart had broken into little pieces as she’d left The Weston Ranch, but the bottom line was even though Carson’s home looked exactly like her dream house, it wasn’t hers. Her life was back in Seattle where she was living according to the plan she’d carefully drawn up for her life a long time ago.

The reason she was miserable right now was exactly because she’d deviated from her plan, she’d colored outside the lines and now look at her. She was a sniveling mess with a broken heart.

Squaring her shoulders, she put down her luggage and taking out her phone, she ordered something to eat online, as well as a few things she’d need tomorrow morning. Only then did she walk to her bedroom to unpack her bag.

It was a pretty room. She’d planned and saved until she was able to buy the exact color curtains and bedding she wanted. It took a while before she could afford a new bed to replace the secondhand one she had, but now the room was everything she’d ever wanted in her own bedroom.

Standing in the doorway, she sighed before she entered. She’d always loved her bedroom. Only tonight it looked empty because Carson and George weren’t in it. It would probably take a few days for her to get back into her usual routine, but in a few weeks’ time she’d have forgotten all about the color of the fall leaves on the ranch, the way the sun hit the snow on the mountain peaks just before it set.