Page 44 of Matilda’s Summer of New Beginnings

We pottered around, cleaning tables, washing glasses and generally sorting things out for the next day, while the Spatchcock gradually settled into itself. It was, I realized, whilst standing in the middle of the snug, a building with a lovely feel to it — peaceful, and happy and relaxed. Like it had done its best to ensure all its visitors had enjoyed themselves that night, and now, as a host, it could just flop into its comfy chair and have five minutes of well-deserved peace.

I wondered what stories that old building could tell, and my mind was off on a flight of fancy as the place relaxed around me.

‘You in the snug, Tilds?’ Jay’s voice called me from the bar.

‘Oh! Yes. I’m just finishing up.’ I pushed the final chair in beneath the table and patted it, then walked back to the bar. ‘The whole place feels very different, doesn’t it?’

‘Really different.’ Jay nodded in agreement. ‘But nice different. And on that note, Sam messaged me earlier, and asked me if I’d mind staying here tonight, because he didn’t want you left alone in a strange place. Also, you’re a paying guest, so it’s not good practice to leave guests alone.’

‘That was kind of him, when he’s got so much else to be thinking about.’ I paused for a moment, once again imagining Damien rushing around with Rosie when she went into labour. The thought appalled me. He was the very last person I’d want around me if I was in that situation, but then again, he would have had nothing at all to do with the conception of my child, so I was fairly safe in that respect. I pushed the thought away, and continued my conversation with Jay. ‘Are you sure that’s okay with you? Staying here, I mean?’

‘Absolutely fine. I’ll be cancelling the lessons I had booked this weekend anyway, as I’ll have to work here instead, but my customers knew it might be happening soon, so they’ll be fine with it. Sam also said I could stay in the flat if I wanted, but I’ll use one of the B&B rooms instead, then I’m closer if you need anything. There are no other residents this weekend. And no, there’s no baby news yet. He said he was quickly texting while he had the chance — he’s in charge of keeping the family and friends updated, and apologizes for dashing off without making sure you were all right.’

‘Gosh, he’s got other things to think about. But I’m sure I’ll be fine if you want to stay in the flat. I doubt I’ll need to call on you in the middle of the night.’

‘No, like I say, it’s not a problem.’ He smiled at me and brandished the bottle of wine. ‘Ready for this now?’

‘Absolutely. You have half of it as well, though.’ I sat down as Jay went and got two clean glasses, then carefully poured out what was left into them.

He brought the glasses over and sat opposite me. ‘Cheers, Matilda. Thanks for your help tonight. It was really appreciated.’

‘My pleasure.’ I took a sip. I realized that this was quite possibly the first time we’d sat and had a drink together in a pub, just the two of us. There’d always been at least Rosie and often Damien with us previously.

Jay must have been thinking along the same lines. ‘Have we ever had a drink together, Tilds? Just us? Beyond coffee, I mean.’

I shook my head. ‘No. Is this weird? I mean, I came down in a proper state earlier, and now we’re pretty chilled and having wine at almost midnight. Twelve hours ago, I would not have imagined this. At all.’

‘Twelve hours ago, my sister was not pregnant to your mate,’ said Jay wryly.

‘True. Well — she was. But we didn’t know. And ugh.’ I shivered theatrically. ‘The thought of it. How could Rosie . . .’ I let my words trail off as I realized, wine or not, it might have been an inappropriate thing to say to Rosie’s big brother. But Jay didn’t seem to take offence.

‘You know,’ he said slowly, staring at his glass, studiously avoiding my eyes and spinning the glass around by its stem. ‘Like I told you, I thought, when we first met each other, that you and Damien were an item. You were always so in tune with each other and doing that sentence-finishing-off thing with each other.’

‘Gross.’ I pulled a face. ‘No way and never ever would I be an item with Damien. We were two kids with a similar background growing up next door to each other.’ I grinned, remembering. ‘Aunty Una always said me and my brother and sister were her “extra babbies”. If she didn’t march us to Sunday School, my mum did. We were like a trail of ducklings following one of them. Usually, Damien and I were trying to push each other into the road.’ I pulled a face.

Jay smiled. ‘Sounds fun. Yeah. Once I got to know you better, I soon realized that you weren’t a couple. Then he had that brief thing with Rosie before. And obviously,’ he shrugged, ‘it’s gone full circle.’ He raised his eyes to meet mine, and it may have been the drowsy cloak of a summer evening, or the fact we’d had wine, or that we were both exhausted, but there was a little smoulder in them, and I was riveted. ‘Regardless. I’m pleased he’s with Rosie and not with you.’ He left the words hanging there, and I stared at him, wondering if the undercurrent I felt was really what I thought it was.

We stared at each other a moment longer, then we both seemed to jolt back to reality: back to being Matilda and Jay, just friends. I blinked and looked at Jay again but the smoulder had gone from his eyes, and the atmosphere had rearranged itself to something we were both more familiar with. ‘Well I thought Polly was your girlfriend!’ I said brightly — probably too brightly — and Jay looked shocked.

‘Polly? Good grief no! She’s a friend with a great singing voice. And she’s so much younger than me! Like eight or nine years. I’m practically an old man to her. She just needs some confidence to get her talents out there.’

‘I didn’t realize she was so young! I feel old too.’ I pulled a face. ‘But I am going to help her dress for the part at the Fayre,’ I said. ‘We’re going for seventies Stevie Nicks.’

‘Amazing.’ Jay nodded. ‘She’ll suit that. So — you’ll be here for the Fayre then?’

I thought for a moment. ‘Oh. I suppose I will be.’

‘Maybe you can help Cerys and Edie out on the cake stall then?’ Jay said it with a smile, and I laughed.

‘Maybe. But maybe not. Poor old Polly won’t do it, though. And she’s panicking enough about running the tea room.’

‘Poor old Polly indeed. Yes, that all happened rather quickly tonight, didn’t it? With Cerys? What a shame that you can’t step in and stay for a few days to help her out, the way you helped me out tonight.’ He smiled, and I knew he wasn’t really serious, but the thought began, slowly and surely, to niggle at me.

But maybe the niggle was due to the wine, and the fact I’d had a lovely time tonight, despite the circumstances that had brought me here.

‘I could do that,’ I said. ‘If I had the week off. But I know you’re not really being serious.’

‘Oh. Hey. You know what, Tilds—’ His expression changed and he leaned towards me. I couldn’t help but move towards him, mirroring his position. ‘Thinking about it, I could be serious. I really could be. Would you do it though? Would you have considered staying for a few more days? If you could? And if I’m truthful’ — our faces were so close that I could feel his warm breath touch my face — ‘I — I don’t really want you to go back just yet.’