Page 3 of Love at First Fright

First ExorSquad Employee

First to Fall in the Line of Duty

“He Answered the Call”

A laugh burst out of me before I could stop it.

They were taking the piss. They had to be.

The door behind Ted’s desk creaked open. Ted reappeared. “He’ll see you now.”

He held the door open, gesturing me through with a jerky wave.

I glanced back at Andrew Wright’s photograph one more time. The bloke’s grin seemed wider now, almost manic.

First to fall.

Really?!

Ted cleared his throat pointedly. “Gerald doesn’t like to be kept waiting.”

I moved toward the door.

The man behind the desk didn’t look up from whatever he was scribbling. He looked to be in his sixties, short hair completely grey. He sat hunched in an oversized leather chair that had seen better decades, its arms worn smooth and cracked like old saddle leather. The office was tiny—barely larger than a cupboard—but every available surface groaned under the weight of bizarre objects that made the space feel like either a hoarder’s paradise or the world’s most chaotic museum.

Shelves lined the walls, crammed with dusty books, ceramic skulls, twisted pieces of metal that might have been talismans, and glass jars containing what looked suspiciously like pickled… things. A stuffed raven perched on top of a filing cabinet, its glass eyes reflecting the sickly fluorescent light. Strange symbols had been carved into the wooden desk, and candle wax dripped down the sides of various holders like frozen waterfalls.

What the actual fuck? Was it too late to hightail it out of there?

The whole place reeked of tobacco and something else—something musty and old, like forgotten attics. I forced myself to step forward, extending my hand in what I hoped was a professional gesture.

“Charlie Hayes. Pleasure to meet you.”

The man finally glanced up, revealing milky blue eyes that instantly pierced right through me. He didn’t stand. Instead, he reached across the desk with tobacco-stained fingers, his handshake surprisingly firm for someone who looked like he survived purely on cigarettes and spite.

“Take a seat, Charlie.”

I did, perching on the edge of a wooden chair that creaked ominously under my weight.

Gerald—I assumed this was Gerald, though he hadn’t introduced himself—rummaged through the paperwork scattered across his desk. After what felt like an eternity of rustling, he produced a single sheet of paper that looked suspiciously like my CV.

A too-long silence stretched between us as he studied it. His eyes moved slowly across the page, as if he were reading it for the very first time. My heart pounded like I’d been summoned to the headmaster’s office. The gaps in my employment history glared up at me from that piece of paper—all those three-month stints I’d conveniently omitted, replaced with fictional charity work and travel adventures. Helping injured lion cubs in Africa. Building schools in Guatemala. The sort of noble pursuits that masked the embarrassing reality of being fired from a call centre for arguing with customers about their insurance policies.

“We’ve been struggling to recruit quality candidates,” Gerald said finally, his voice carrying the rasp of someone who’d been smoking since the womb.

“Oh? Well, I have to say I was surprised that I couldn’t find your job advert online…”

Gerald frowned. “Online? Right. Well, I’ll have to get Ted to look at that. Anyway.” He leaned forward, steepling his fingertips. “So, tell me, what attracts you to this role, Charlie?”

The competitive salary you apparently offer, accompanied by the fact I’ve eaten instant ramen for dinner three nights running.

“Well…” I cleared my throat. “This position certainly sounds… unique. And I love the challenge of learning new skills.”

That line had served me well in many other interviews. Yet Gerald’s expression didn’t change. “Do you have any interest in the occult?”

“The occult?”

“Supernatural phenomena. Spirits. Entities that exist beyond the physical realm. Communication with the deceased.” He leaned back in his chair, studying my reaction. “That sort of thing.”