Page 61 of Deadly Waves

“It’s not.”

“But it is,” Mandy said. “I’ve come to grips with that. You can argue all you want, but the fact remains that Clint was obsessed with me. Heidi only dated Clint because I suggested it. Clint only dated Heidi because he thought it was a game.

“She died because he wanted to win the game,” she continued. “That is on me and I can never change it. I’ve decided to let it go, however.”

James stilled as he studied her profile. She looked tortured. “I want you to let it go, but I can’t stand the fact that you blame yourself. Clint was sick and twisted. You didn’t do anything to encourage him.”

“I know that,” Mandy said. “I’ve thought about it. A lot. I don’t think he was legitimately crazy. I do think that he was deliberately manipulative, though. He only saw what he wanted to see.”

“That’s very true.”

“I’m ready to let this go, James,” Mandy said, her shiny eyes locking with his somber orbs. “I need you to do the same.”

James balked. “I … I’m not holding onto it.”

“You’re not holding onto Heidi’s death like I am,” Mandy clarified. “You are holding on to the guilt, though. You need to let it go. Clint didn’t take me because you failed. Clint took me because he was a freak.”

“Baby, I … .” James wet his lips. “I did fail you. I promised to love and protect you and Clint took you anyway. That’s on me.”

“No, it’s not,” Mandy said. “You can’t protect me from everything. You have the best heart of anyone I know, but the guilt will eat you alive if you don’t let it go. That’s what I need from you. That’s the gift I truly want.”

James opened his mouth to argue and then snapped it shut. She was right. He inherently knew it. Instead of putting up a token fight, he opened his arms and tugged her onto his lap.

“I’m going to let it go, baby,” James said after a beat. “You’re going to let it go. I’m going to let it go. We’re going to move forward together. I think you’re right. That’s the only thing we can do.”

“Good.” Mandy tightened her grip on his neck and clung to him.

James knew they had a lot of work in front of them, but he was more than happy to hold his wife and let the weight of the world lift off his shoulders as their hearts sank into the same rhythm and beat as one. They both needed it.

“Twenty minutes, wife,” James whispered, kissing her cheek. “We have to go back to work after that.”

“Deal. I’m going to want another gift to motivate me, though.”

And there it was, the final piece of the puzzle to dislodge the cloud Clint left hanging over their lives. She always knew how to find the bright spot in life.

“You’re a tough negotiator, baby, but I think we can come to terms.”

“Now that’s what I want to hear.”