Page 59 of Unwritten Rules

“Jesus Christ, Nathaniel. Everyone has been trying to ring you! What the—”

I hold a hand up, palm facing her, to bring her up short. I need to clear the air, and I need to do it now. Right this second.

“Please, may I speak first?”

She rolls her eyes impatiently, opening her mouth to continue, but I cut her off, speaking first. Needing to get the words out.

“I’m sorry, littlest DeMarco. I shouldn’t have blamed you last week. I was to blame just as much – probably more, to be honest. I—”

She steps closer, shaking her head angrily. “No, Nathaniel. This isn’t the time—”

I place my forefinger over her lips, silencing her whilst taking a moment to pin her firmly beneath the intensity of my stare.

Piercing her with each and every tumultuous feeling and near-violent urge that she brings to life within my soul. Forcing her to not just know, but to feel how powerfully she affects me and how powerless I am to act on it.

“That’s the thing, Hellcat—”

She inhales sharply through her nostrils, her pupils widening at my casual use of that name. The name that indicates precisely how I see her.

“That’s the thing, you see? There’s never going to be a time. For me to give you what you want from me.”

Her brows draw together, and she tries to jerk away, but I catch her firmly behind her neck, tugging her close – so fucking close I want nothing more than to steal a kiss.

To steal all her kisses like the thief I’ve been of late, stealing illicit moments that she has no idea of.

Sheer force of will puts a stop to the overwhelming urge to follow my desires as I rest my forehead lightly on hers, my eyes firmly fixed on her golden orbs.

“I’m thirty-one years old, littlest DeMarco. I’m as jaded as fuck. I don’t like people, and I don’t like change. I’m a stubborn prick – and your brother’s best friend.”

My stomach lurches at the acknowledgement, reminding me exactly what I am and what I need to do. I steel myself and continue.

“I may be all those things, but I refuse to be selfish. Not when it comes to you. I can’t take what you’re offering me, Hellcat. No matter how much I want to – because believe me, I want to—”

Mila’s body stiffens at my words, cutting me off as we hold one another’s gaze. The intensity and unconcealed longing in her beautiful eyes are almost my undoing.

I inhale sharply, forcing the words out through gritted teeth, pleading with her to accept what I can offer because I know now that a life without her is a life half-lived. I need her friendship in my world, but that’s as selfish as I can allow myself to be here.

“But I can’t take it. I won’t. I won’t risk everything we have because I can’t keep my fucking dick in my pants.”

My eyes flick back and forth between her golden ones, willing her to hear what I’m saying, praying that she believes my empty words.

“Make no mistake, Hellcat. You are the woman of my dreams, but our friendship means more to me than risking everything we have on a quick roll in the hay, yeah?”

Slowly, I remove my finger from across her lips, allowing my half-truth to float between us while I inhale her sweet exhalations.

Minutes pass as we survey one another, as my words sink in until she blinks several times in rapid succession as though to pull herself from her thoughts.

She steps away from me, putting physical distance between us, and my body cries out for more.

More of her delectable proximity.

Her next words are not at all what I expect. True to form.

“If you checked your damn phone, you’d know Liv’s just had the baby.”

CHAPTER 18

MILA