Page 72 of Buzzer Beater

“What are we going to need?” Erik asked, looking eager.

“A blanket, two peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, and someone to play the guitar.”

Wyatt laughed. “You’re right, that isn’t romantic at all.”

I shrugged. “We said I love you eating lunch one afternoon on campus. We were laying on the grass and there was some guy playing the guitar. He started playing Love of My Life and she told me how much she liked it. I told her I did too.”

Erik laughed. “Then you said I like this song, but I love you?”

I almost threw sand at him. “I was a bit smoother than that.”

They both narrowed their eyes.

“Seriously. That’s not what happened.”

“I hope not.” Erik shook his head.

“We’ll get the blanket and sandwiches ready, but who can play the guitar?”

“Grant.” I offered.

“Really? Perfect.” Wyatt said as if that was enough.

My shoulders dropped. “But he didn’t bring one here.”

“You know what, I’ll figure it out.” Erik said with confidence. “You just ask Grant to play and plan out what you’re going to say.”

Yeah. Just that. Just the most important conversation I’ll likely ever have. No big deal. “Thanks guys.”

They nodded and turned, leaving me alone.

This was really happening. I was getting my chance to win Lucy back. Something I’d thought about for years. I’d rehearsed in my mind what I’d say if I had the chance thousands of times, but now that it was here, I had no idea what would be enough.

How could I make her understand what she meant to me? What she had always meant to me?

This wasn’t going to be easy. I’d always imagined having to beg and grovel for forgiveness, then she’d agree and that was it. All I needed was her forgiveness, but in this scenario, I had it. She was willing to let go of the past. It was the future she was apprehensive about.

Why did she think we were so different? We might have aged and changed a little, but at the core we were the same people we always were.

I couldn't imagine anything major enough to keep us apart. That was enough to give me hope. I’d tell her there was nothing that would make me stop loving her. Nothing was big enough to keep me away.

How could she say no to that?

How’d I become this person? Insecure and doubting everything about me?

In every other aspect of my life I knew what I was doing. I was confident. I was in control. But not with Lucy.

That’s what made this a hundred times scarier and harder to plan. She threw me off kilter, but she also centered me. She reminded me of what mattered most. She made me believe that if I woke up tomorrow unable to play hockey ever again, I’d still have an amazing future because I’d be with her.

How could I get her to understand that?

If only I were able to open my heart and allow her to see everything. My doubts, my fears, my dreams.

That was it.

That’s what I had to do. I needed to open up and show her everything. Let her in and let her know everything. I couldn't hold anything back. This wasn’t the time to care about my pride. There was too much at risk.

With newfound determination, I stood and walked back to the resort. I wanted to write this down. Get my thoughts together so I didn't end up rambling or forgetting something. I also needed to hunt down Grant. I didn't think he’d have problem participating, but he might have to learn the song. In less than a day.