Page 8 of Snowflakes and Ice Skates

Pride.

That’s what it came down to. I’d set my goal and made sure the world knew. Moving back was like I’d failed. My pride wouldn’t let me do that.

“Why are you so concerned about this?”

He turned a few inches to face me. “Because I’ve known you almost your whole life. I’ve seen you at your best and your worst. I’ve seen you in Chicago and I’ve seen you at home. You’re happier here. You belong here. I also think that you could be just as successful here as you could in the city.”

He’d visited me with Steven once, my first year in school. He couldn’t judge my entire life there based on that one time.

This was too much. Too heavy. And since when did Vince pay attention to me?

“I appreciate your input, but I’m not changing my mind.”

I walked away from him, refusing to look back. He could share his opinion, but that didn’t mean I had to listen. He had no right to tell me how to live my life, especially not after spending years making it harder.

Maybe Mom or Steven put him up to it?

They all knew of my old crush on him. Maybe they thought if it came from him, I’d listen.

Well that backfired.

I smiled and made small talk with people I passed before making sure the food and drinks were well stocked. I went into host-mode. Never staying in one place for too long. Making sure everyone else was having a good time. When people began leaving I handed out the peppermint bark and wished them a Merry Christmas.

And the entire time my mind was on what Vince had said. No matter how hard I tried to push it out, he’d implanted himself.

Two days around him and I was back to obsessing over him and every word that left his perfect lips.

Great. I thought I would have grown smarter through college. I was right back to who I was the last time I lived in this house.

Maybe that’s why I really wanted to leave.

I froze. Guests streamed past me, but I didn’t see them.

Was I running away from Roseville or from Vince?

“Harlow, are you okay?”

I looked up and nodded to a professor Dad works with. “Yes, thank you. Merry Christmas.”

That couldn’t be it? Could it?

I was running from being hurt by Vince again.

That was enough to send rage through my entire body. Who was he to run me out of my hometown? How had I let him have so much control over me? Why had I been so innocent back then? So hopeful?

I’d been a fool, and I won’t do that again.

During my senior year, Steven and Vince came home from school to visit and I decided it was time. It was my chance to finally tell him how I felt. I was eighteen, no longer a child and I thought I’d matured enough for him to finally see me as a woman.

We’d all been watching a movie and Steven fell asleep. I asked Vince to go outside with me to look at the stars. I thought it was so romantic it would be impossible for him to turn me down.

We sat on the porch and watched for shooting stars. I worked up the courage and finally told him that I was in love with him. That I always had been. I waited for seconds that felt like years for him to respond. He told me he loved me as family. I was his little sister. He gave me a hug and went back to the movie. Neither of us ever brought it up again. He acted the same around me, which was a miracle, and I forced myself to kill the crush. I had to give it up.

But it was alive and well after just one day back.

Four

I managed to sleep in the next morning. I wanted to finally relax. When I got out of bed at ten I stepped into my slippers and went downstairs to find the rest of my family. Maybe today we could go sledding or shopping.