Page 71 of Trick Play

“We made sure he wouldn’t get in trouble for drinking,” Reid cut in. “That was the first thing we made sure of before saying anything. The problem isn’t even the fact that he drank, it’s that he has so much going on and refuses to talk to anyone about it.”

He talked to me. He opened up to me. We made progress with one another, but I wasn’t a professional. I couldn’t help him with his parents’ drama or the pressure he was under.

“He’s been better lately.” I wasn’t entirely sure why I was defending him, except that it didn’t seem like anyone else was in that moment.

“Maybe for now. For a little while, but things aren’t going to actually be fixed or healed until he works through it with someone who has the proper training and resources,” Haley said.

“The coaches know this isn’t about the drinking that night. They know that was a one-off. They’re concerned about how he’s handling the pressure of school and the upcoming draft and everything else life has thrown at him. They can see how overwhelmed and exhausted he is. They want to help him as much, if not more, than we do.” Reid sighed. “I don’t know why he thought it was you. I’m really sorry he came at you like that. We’ll call him and talk to him.”

Good. I wasn’t the right person to be there for him. I wasn’t his family or close friend.

I was a classmate.

Someone from his past. It wasn’t my place to get involved more than I already was.

“Okay, let me know if I can help in any way.”

“Thanks, Kennedy,” Haley said before we each said bye.

I dropped back against the pillows and turned my head to Lo. “This sucks.”

She pursed her lips. “I guess I never really stopped to think about everything he might be dealing with. He’s so easy to hate, I forget he’s human too. Not just the devil.”

I cracked a smile. “We all have our own issues.”

“Some more than others,” she mumbled while reaching for the remote and turning on the TV. I pulled out my tablet and finished up a few assignments I’d been putting off while she caught up on a reality dating show.

It wasn’t until late that night, after I was in bed and reading to try to quiet my mind, that my phone dinged.

I picked it up and frowned at the notification of a text from Ethan. Did I want to read it? I wasn’t sure I was in a state to handle him yelling and blaming me.

Maybe he already spoke to Haley and Reid. Maybe he wasn’t angry at me anymore.

I opened it and frowned.

Ethan: I’m horrified and ashamed

I was about to reply when another message appeared.

Ethan: I was too blinded by my anger to think clearly. I never should have thought it was you, or that you would go behind my back. I know that’s not the person you are. I know we aren’t the people we once were, but I should have known better. I should have trusted you. I’m sorry

His last two words broke me. He didn’t say them easily. Maybe it was because of his parents or some coach’s influence, but it was rare for him to say he was sorry.

Yet, lately he was willing to say sorry to me whenever he was wrong. That was growth. How was it I was the only one to see how much he’d changed? Was it because I was at a distance? The time away let us both mature, and I was able to recognize it more than the closest people to him.

I stared at the screen, unsure what I should say. It wasn’t okay that he verbally attacked me and never gave me the chance to ask questions or explain, but he knew that.

Kennedy: I forgive you

It was all I could say. I wouldn’t condemn him further, and I wasn’t going to blow off the whole event. As soon as I spoke to Haley and Reid and found out what really happened, I let go of the anger, but that didn’t make it right.

Ethan: I have an appointment with a school psychologist tomorrow. Can we talk after?

We could wait until Tuesday in class, but if he was asking, this was what he needed. I didn’t have to say yes. I could hear Lo’s voice screaming at me to protect myself. Remember what he put me through. Remember the pain and hurt.

I could never forget.

But that didn’t mean I couldn’t forgive him for that too. I didn’t want to hang onto this anymore. I already spent three years hating him. So much time and energy wasted on wishing the worst for him.