Page 5 of Shattered Hearts

Cheeks flushed, stomach twisting like a wrench, I bend over the toilet, throwing up the tingling bile that’s been steadily rising since I bought the test from the store in Rafter’s Falls.

I couldn’t buy one in Ashwood Creek. The whole town would have known in less than twenty minutes, and that’s the last thing I need right now. Gossip spreads faster than peanut butter on bread. I drove half an hour away just for this stupid little thing, but I had to. I had to know for sure, even if it makes me queasy.

Hot tears stream down my face, adding to the heat in the room. Sweat clings to my fair hair, and mascara coats my skin in rivers of black. It’s quite a sight in the mirror, if I do say so myself, but I’m feeling too dreadful to care.

Once my stomach is empty, I lean against the cold tiled wall, staring up at the test on the basin.

This can’t be happening.

It was only one time.

The first and only time I’ve been with someone.

And he wasn’t Grayson.

A choked sob escapes my chest, and I drop my face in my hands, allowing myself to wallow in the privacy of my humid bathroom. The quietness of my family’s home reminds me of how alone I am right now. My parents are currently in Noosa on their year-long trip around the coast in a newly acquired caravan. They’re probably lying on the beach in the sun, or swimming with colourful fish in the reef.

And here I am, drowning in my own tears over the stupidest thing I have ever done, and there have been quite a few over the years…

I need to call Macie, but I already know Reid is planning to propose to her today—well, officially ask her to be his girlfriend—and I really can’t ruin that. I would be the worst friend in the world to take away from her special day.

I could always call Grayson…

Shakily getting to my feet, I snatch my phone off the bench, ignoring the vile feeling sticking to the inside of my throat, and open it. Thumbing through names and numbers, my finger freezes over his name.

Grayson Lawson.

My best friend since I was four. The first person I clung to in pre-school and haven’t let go of since.

And the only guy I’ve ever loved.

My shoulders shake again as tears sting my eyes. I press them shut, my lips trembling uncontrollably as a wave of nausea rushes through me again. I gag into the sink, knowing very well that there’s nothing left in my stomach to get out.

Tossing my phone aside, I splash my face with cold water. The droplets cool me down enough for my stammering pulse to become more controllable as I lean against the bench. Eyes staring back at the girl in the mirror, I let a wretched cry burst from my chest.

Eight weeks ago, I was fine. I was still a virgin. I was patiently waiting for Grayson to fall for me. I knew he was it for me. I’ve known that since our third year of high school. That’s when my eyes reshaped into hearts for only him, and I no longer saw Grayson as only my friend.

We were in sports class, and Mrs Henderson was teaching everyone field hockey. Grayson was a natural, which is no surprise since his entire family was gifted with sporty genes. He was picked to be on the other team. As gutted as I was, I went up against him, which was definitely not the right choice. One moment I was charging, the next I had a bruise on my thigh so big it felt like I’d shattered the bone. I couldn’t walk to First Aid, so Grayson picked me up like I weighed nothing and carried me there himself. With my legs hanging over his arm, and the other securing my back, I shouldn’t have looked him in the eyes as I held onto his neck, but I did.

I’m not sure what happened at that moment. The second that our eyes caught, I couldn’t tear my gaze away. I never thought of him the same way after that.

But now all my chances of being with Grayson have flown out the window, shattering the glass on its way out and flying far away. All because of that stupid plastic test.

Cringing, I grab my phone again, click on her name, and put the call on speaker. I stare through the mirror at my sunken eyes, rosy cheeks, and shiny skin until relief floods my veins at the sound of my cousin’s familiar voice.

“Laynie? What’s up?”

I sniff, the sound echoing off the walls. I leave the bathroom on shaky legs. “H—hi—u-um,” I stutter, not knowing how to start the conversation. Sadie is the closest family I have—both in age and distance—right now. Living in Sydney, she’s still over an hour away, but my parents are even further. And I really don’t want to disappoint them with this news. They’ve waited their whole lives to travel in their caravan, so why shatter their dream right now?

“Are you okay?” Sadie’s sweet lilt comes through again as I walk into my bedroom and sink onto the mattress. It’s worn but comfortable, and my spare hand scrunches the flowery covers, grounding myself as I shake my head.

“No,” I barely whisper.

There’s movement on the other end, and I hear a car door slam. “What happened, Laylay?”

I can’t help but roll my eyes at her nickname for me. She’s two years younger than me, and she’s called me that since she first started talking. It stuck.

To be fair, though, I call her Didi in return.