Page 19 of For I Have Sinned

Bekah smiles. “There aren’t many. Religion and Theology, Spiritual Development, World Religion, Liberal Arts, and, of course, Prayer.”

I nod as if I know anything they are talking about. “How often are the classes?”

“One class every day, but they like to give the women as a whole different schedules to avoid overcrowding in the classrooms,” Joanna says. “For us three and some others, Religion and Theology are on Mondays, Spiritual is on Tuesdays, World Religion on Wednesdays, and Liberal Arts is on Thursdays. Prayer is always on Sunday for everyone.”

“And Friday and Saturday?” I question, looking from Joanna to the other woman with black hair.

Esther pokes at her salad, keeping her eyes down as she seems uninterested in the conversation. I observe her for a moment, and if I can tell anything by her body language, she doesn’t want to be in this convent either.

“Those are our free days,” Bekah responds to my question, causing my eyes to pull away from Esther. “Most of us use the time to tend to the garden or help out in the kitchen. Some people use their free days to study the Bible, while others use them to relax. It’s really whatever you want to do.”

Good to know I can lock myself in my room on those days and avoid socializing with any of these people. “How long have you all been here?”

Joanna answers for everyone. “I’ve been here for four years, Bekah three, and Esther has only been here for a year.”

I glance at Esther, who lets out a breathy laugh. It was quiet enough that the other two didn’t notice, but I did. I remain silent as Joanna and Bekah fall into conversation about something I don’t care about.

Despite my stomach growling, I don’t rush to eat anything else. Instead, I pick at the bread of my sandwich when I feel someone watching me. I lift my eyes to find Father Alexander observing me carefully.

When our eyes meets, he immediately drops his gaze and pokes around the food on his plate. I continue to watch him for a moment longer until he looks my way again before he turns to say something to Father Keaton.

Dropping my attention back to my food, I put the piece of bread I’ve been moving around the plate in my mouth. Joanna and Bekah are still talking, and I block them out as I force myself to finish the food.

Chapter 8

Father Alexander

She looked like a scared little lamb when she ran into me in the hallway earlier this morning. The fear in her eyes haunted my mind all day.

It was as if she were trying to communicate with me only through her stare, pleading with me to help her. Before she could say anything, Father Keaton had come down the hall to have Sister Alice escort her to the room she would be staying in.

He reassured me she was okay and that she was having second thoughts about her decision to be here. The tone in his voice told me not to ask any other questions about the situation, so I didn’t. I kept my mouth shut and went about my day, Celine still teetering on the cusp of my mind.

I watch as she walks into the dining hall with Sister Alice. Her eyes wandering around the tables, taking in the scene of the other women enjoying their meals. The horrified expression was gone from her face; instead, she looked almost annoyed. As if she couldn’t be bothered to be here.

I observe her as Sister Alice escorts her to the food line. Her white dress flows behind her as she walks between the tables. My eyes can’t help but scan down the fabric. Every dress looks the same, but when she wears it, it looks different for some reason. On Celine, the white dress makes her appear as if she were a real-life angel.

As she begins walking to the table she will be sitting at, I pick up the roll on my plate and take a bite when Father Keaton sits beside me and says, “She’ll fit in well.”

“Are you sure? She looks like she’d rather be any place but here.”

He inhales deeply through his nose, sparing a glance at Celine. “Some women have come here before your time and have behaved the same way. She is afraid, which is a normal reaction. This is a new place for her, and she doesn’t understand that we are trying to help her.”

My eyes drop to my plate as soon as Celine stops at the table across from mine. I don’t want Father Keaton to notice me staring at her for too long, so I scoop a spoonful of yogurt into my mouth and lift my eyes just a bit to see her being introduced to the three women. After she takes a seat, she gives the other women a tight smile as they introduce themselves.

I keep watching her interact with them. Her body is stiff as she keeps herself guarded, asking them questions and listening to what they have to say.

When the conversation ends, Joanna and Bekah start speaking with one another. Celine keeps quiet and picks at a piece of bread on her plate. Her lips are in a pout, the skin between her brows creases, and she scrunches her nose as she inspects the meal.

Father Keaton has fallen into conversation with Sister Alice, who has now joined us. While he’s occupied, I take the time to really study Celine.

Her skin has a natural glow, and her green eyes are as soft as watercolor paint. She has a perfect nose. The tip turns upward in the slightest, as you’d see on a fairy. My eyes find hers again, and my body stiffens when I see her staring back at me. I clear my throat, dropping my gaze to my food.

“Father Alexander?” My jaw slows its movement when Father Keaton says my name. I hum in response, turning my head in his direction. “Will you keep an eye on Celine? I only ask because I’m afraid she might attempt to run again, and if that happens, I would be worried about her well-being. And the panic it would send her parents into.”

“Sure,” I agree. “I’ll keep an eye on her.”

“Thank you.” He smiles. “You are a great asset to the church.”