Page 61 of An Irish Hope

“Yeah.” He tapped his card, and tried to not look like the crazy man she obviously thought he was.

But he did feel like he was verging on desperation, unable to sleep, second-guessing everything. Had he been wrong to make that vow to God? Last week’s sermon had suggested he was, talking about some of the foolish vows people made based more on pride than actual God leading. Is that what he’d been about? In ignoring Aisling—or trying to—had he missed what God had for him because it didn’t fit Andy’s planned timeline?

He felt like an idiot. It wasn’t any wonder she hadn’t sought him out this past month. It would be so easy to talk to her, except any time he scrounged up enough courage it was to find that she was busy, or was with her friend or Moira.

And now he’d created a whole lot of other issues because he still hadn’t dealt with that properly. Like how to keep pretending she didn’t bother him when every time he glimpsed her at school, his heart started to throb, and he did his best to move away out of her line of sight. He wondered if Miles had noticed. The kid might be arrogant, but he did notice random stuff, and had a way with connecting with some of the kids so they responded well to him.

Patrick had talked with him and the other mentor teachers about how the mentoring was going, and it was all that Andy could do to not lose himself in whatever Moira was saying. He couldn’t afford to act so interested in her words, in her student. Even if it was true.

He didn’t understand. Why would God bring Aisling here of all places? It was almost like a divine set up had been arranged to test him. It felt like the height of irony to have the woman he’d refused to say goodbye to show up at his school. And the fact she hadn’t sought him out meant she probably had found this as challenging as he did.

Which led to him sitting here, in an attempt to clear his head and heart of someone who simply refused to leave.

“Andy?”

He glanced up. His heart stuttered. “What are you doing here?”

Greta smiled. “It’s been a while.”

Queasiness rolled across his stomach. Not long enough. He narrowed his gaze. “What do you want?”

“I wanted to see how you are.”

“How did you know I was here?”

She waved a hand. “Oh, someone told me you were here. I forget who.”

He shook his head. “I’m meeting someone, so I need you to leave.”

“But I thought you might want to, I don’t know, see if we could fix things up.”

“Why would you think that?” He frowned. “What happened to Jonny? Remember, that man you dumped me for?”

“Oh, it hasn’t been working for a while.”

Sounds like a you problem, he thought but didn’t say. “There is nothing to fix,” he said instead. “You made it clear you didn’t want me, and that helped me see just what kind of person you are. And the fact that we’d never suit. So, goodbye.”

“But Andy—”

“No. We’re finished. We were finished a long time ago. And I’m not going to try to reheat somebody else’s leftovers. I’m moving on.” That last might’ve sounded harsher than he wanted but she’d been cruel in how she’d treated him.

“I can’t believe you’re being so harsh.”

He shrugged. “Excuse me.”

He drained his drink then went to the men’s bathroom. She wouldn’t follow him in here.

After waiting a few moments he went back outside, saw Greta had moved from his table. Good. He returned, put his elbows on the table and concentrated on breathing. Around him the noise of the pub continued but he barely paid it mind. He needed to get his heart recalibrated.

God, I don’t know what that was about, but it seems strange it came when I was supposed to meet Grady.

Speaking of, where was Grady? He glanced at his phone. Nope. No messages from him.

He sighed, and prayed that Greta would have enough sense to stay away. He really didn’t want to get caught in her sticky web again.

“Lord, I don’t want distractions. I only want what you have for me.”

“Something to eat?” the waitress from before asked him.