Page 65 of Newly Tied

“Yeah. All the time,” he admitted. “And sometimes the rage gets me, you know?”

I did know. I had felt the same way for years. But after I met Lang, everything had changed, even that. Outside of therapy, I didn’t think about my father much anymore.

“Sorry to bring that shit up.”

“No, don’t be. I’m surprised though.” I reached out and slipped my hand around the side of his neck to ease him forward, close to me. “You’re not a big believer in violence.”

“I know,” he mused, smiling at me with red-rimmed eyes.

As a rule, in his personal life, Lang did not believe in bloodshed unless it was warranted, unless an individual was placed in a life-and-death situation. It was why he was such a wordsmith. He’d learned early how to outmaneuver bullies and had been able to talk his way out of every single one of his playground disagreements before they escalated. He truly believed that in every situation, a compromise could be reached.

In his professional life, he knew that at times, like in the early morning, that Ian had to shoot those men before they murdered others. It was pure luck that they had not taken the lives of any civilians, and in that situation, there was no other choice. Lang understood that. He would have also understood if Ian had ended up killing them to protect civilians. He’d taken lives as a homicide detective and had hoped not to as a marshal. I was the same, but in the middle of a firefight, protecting yourself and others, those choices could be taken from us. And while that was the job, it didn’t make it any easier to deal with. And yet…he had revealed the desire to unleash all his anger on my father for past transgressions that would never be committed again.

“You can’t ever do that, you know,” I said, smoothing my thumb along his jaw.

“Yes, I’m aware,” he mumbled, gently bumping his head down on my shoulder. “But don’t think I’m criticizing you or⁠—”

“No. I didn’t.” I wrapped him in my arms. “You just wanna take care of me.”

“That’s right,” he rasped, clearing his throat so his voice came back.

“Well, I like that,” I confessed. “I’ve never had anyone wanna do that.”

“Yes, I know,” he said, sounding sad.

I needed to fix that. “But you know I’m not some stray, right?”

Instant scowl, which was good. “How the hell are you a stray if you belong to me?”

It was an excellent point, and I grinned lazily.

“Oh, I see what you did there,” he said, nodding. “That was pretty good.”

I shrugged.

“So listen,” he began, sounding all serious. “I don’t have anything for your hair, and I’m sorry about that. We’ll get you something to keep over here.”

“As well as whatever you want me to use at home?”

He squinted at me. “Or, we can keep everything over here.”

I crossed my arms. “Is that right? You’re just gonna move me in already? That fast?”

“Is it fast?”

I nodded.

“So you want us to date?”

“Shouldn’t we?”

“Haven’t we been doing that?” he asked, squinting at me.

Fair point. We’d been inseparable, other than during his dates or my hookups.

“I mean, I know why you had sex with all those guys.”

“There weren’t that many,” I said defensively, realizing that with the towel still wrapped around my head, I probably looked ridiculous.