Page 10 of Heart of the Race

His voice was so full of heart-tugging need it took everything in me to stay where I was.

“Hey, which one of the women out there is your girlfriend? I can go get⁠—”

“No. I only want you here.”

He was saying everything I wanted to hear, in completely the wrong context.

“Could you hold my hand?” It was a request, and the trembling made him clench his jaw.

“You need to be more careful.”

“Come watch me—” His voice hitched with the roll of pain through his body that made him twitch. “—then you can make sure.”

“Give yourself some more drugs before you stress your body.”

“You do it.”

The button was in his hand. “Just press it already.”

“You.” He insisted like a child.

“Don’t be an idiot, you could go into shock.”

“Promise to come with me. I know you’re not afraid,” he whispered.

And he was right, I wasn’t. I couldn’t explain it. Getting busted up with fractured bones had happened to him so many times in the past, I was used to it. But having him die never entered my realm of possibility. I’d never worried about that.

“If you’re there, I’ll be okay,” he said as tears started to well in his eyes.

“Oh, for fuck’s sake, Varro,” I huffed, grabbing the button that pushed the meds and then pressing it quickly.

He was so hurt, just broken, but still he managed to take my hand before I pulled it back, and slid his fingers between mine.

“Let go,” I ordered lamely, since it was the last thing I really wanted.

“Why do you hate me now? What did I do?”

“You didn’t do anything,” I said softly. “I promise.”

“Then how come we don’t talk like we used to?” He tensed in pain. “And how come I never see you?”

“People grow up, V.”

He whimpered in the back of his throat. “Just come with me so I can feel like me and not somebody else.”

“I’m not this important.”

He tried for a grin but winced instead. “Isn’t that for me to say?”

“You’re being ridiculous.”

“I don’t think so,” he said, staring up at me with wounded, blood-filled eyes. “You know, you used to pet me when you thought I was passed out and wouldn’t notice.”

I had no secrets from this man.

“I liked that, and I liked listening to you breathe.”

God.