Page 8 of Heart of the Race

“No—”

“Stop.” She held up a hand. “I’m not a fool. There’s only one person he believes and listens to and heeds.”

“Heeds.” I snorted out a laugh.

“It’s true,” she insisted. “You’re the one he saw in the window and invited into his life. You’re the one who never said stop, only go. He’s used to looking over his shoulder and seeing you there, and now you’re not.”

“He has his life and I have mine.”

“No.”

I shook my head. “I can’t be his shadow for the rest of my life.”

“That’s not what he needs.”

“Then what are you saying?”

“Only for a little while, one season only.”

“But I’m working and going to school and⁠—”

“You can work for him, and school can be done on the Internet, Brian.”

And of course his sponsor would pay me, and yes, I could do my coursework online, but why should I have to?

Why did I always have to follow him?

“It’s not fair of you to ask me for anything.”

“Isn’t it?”

Shit. The guilt card.

“Brian?”

My gaze locked on hers. “You don’t know what you’re really asking.”

“I do. But understand this, for him, for you, for Nico—it would be the same request. It’s not you for Varro, or because I saved you, now you have to save him.”

“Are you sure?”

Her eyes blazed in that way that I knew, from years of shared space, that she was furious. “If the roles were reversed, and Varro needed you—this would be the same conversation.”

“Yes, but that could never happen, right? He’s the one who’s scary, not me. Not Nico.”

She nodded. “This is true, so we will never be able to test this.”

I was going to say something, anything, to wriggle free.

“But,” she said softly, but somehow thunderously at the same time. Her voice blew right through me, “that doesn’t mean that you can use that to say no.”

Everything froze. I could feel my lungs constrict. “You don’t get it.”

“I do.” She nodded. “And I don’t care what sacrifices you need to make right now because, again, I would ask the same of Varro, or Nico, if the roles were reversed.”

Would she? Or was she asking me because I wasn’t hers, and she loved Varro more? She would use me to make sure he stayed in one piece.

“He loves you best, Brian, that can’t be changed. And because of that, this is all on you.”