Page 301 of A Matter of Time

“And I’m still worried, Sam, but what am I gonna do, just live in fear that something’s gonna go wrong? I mean, c’mon—something will always go wrong, we just gotta roll with it this time. I don’t know if you feel it, but… And maybe it’s as simple as we’re both older, I dunno, I just…” I took a steadying breath. “I’m at the job I’m gonna keep, ya know? And I have Dylan and Chris and friends that have stuck around, and of course Dane and now his wife, Aja, and…I just didn’t have you, and now you’re here, so… And I’ve got your family’s blessing…so I figure”—I shrugged—“I’m good to go.”

He gave me a crooked grin. “So you’re saying what? You’ll move in with me?”

“No.” I shook my head. “That part we do need to take slow.”

“Then what?”

“We can date.”

He scowled at me. “I don’t wanna date you, I wanna live with you.”

“Well, you get to date me.” I smiled at him. “You gotta start somewhere.”

“I want you to move in with me.”

“Let me explain something to you,” I began. “You can keep saying that, but it’s not gonna change anything.”

Just the very corner of his lips curved. “Oh no?”

“Let’s see how it goes, Sam.”

He nodded. “It’s gonna go so great. You’re gonna be begging me to move in.”

“We’ll see.”

“But you won’t see anyone else.” He was clarifying, making sure. “I’m the only one you’re sleeping with from now on, right?”

“Right.”

“Okay,” he said. “I’ll take it. It’s a start.”

I just looked at him. He’d take it, like he had a choice… The man was hilarious. Of course he’d take it; it was all he was going to get right now.

He put his hands on my face. “You mean it, right? There’s only gonna be me?”

Did I mean it? I searched my heart just to make sure nothing felt weird. I purposefully tried to think of our worst times, but all that came to mind was us having breakfast in the middle of the afternoon. Just the two of us together in his apartment, sitting and eating, being together and talking about the events of the night. It felt comfortable and right. There was only good stuff, nothing bad.

“Yeah, I mean it,” I told him. “And God help you when Dane gets back from his honeymoon.”

“I will work on Dane Harcourt because he’s your brother and you love him.” He grabbed me roughly, and his arms went around me as he lifted me off my feet. “But so you know, you’re the most important thing, J. I’m gonna make you so happy this time, I swear to God.”

I smiled, wrapping my arms around him, holding him tight. “What? You love me?”

“I do,” he said, and I felt the shiver run through his huge frame. “You know I do.”

“Yeah?”

“Fuck yeah.”

I really needed to work on the swearing. “Yeah, well, I love you too.” I sighed in his arms. “It’s exhausting, but I do.”

“I know, baby. I know.”

SEVEN

Ihad been frantic all Friday, trying to catch up and do my job as well as Dylan’s, so when Sam called and said he was coming to pick me up for lunch, I had to turn him down. I was buried, and it was a nice change that he understood and said he had things to catch up on himself. I told him I would see him at dinner, so I was surprised when he showed up at noon with Chinese food. It was really nice, and the makeout session on the couch was even better. When I was shoving him out the door two hours later, he looked sad until I passed him the extra set of keys I had for my apartment. His smile lit his eyes.

“What?” I smiled back.