Page 424 of A Matter of Time

His confession that he wanted to sink inside me and touch my heart brought blood rushing through my veins, my muscles tightening all at once as the wave crashed over me. I felt the jolts of pleasure move through Sam, his body shaking with them until his breath caught and it was my name that was called out. In that brief, white-hot, heart-pounding, flooded-with-euphoria moment…everything seemed perfect.

He lifted off me quickly, careful that I wouldn’t be crushed, and I heard his zipper and then the jingle of his belt buckle.

“All done with me, are you?” I said, smiling into my pillow.

“Never done with you,” he said hoarsely. “Flip over.”

And when I did, I realized he’d been taking his clothes off, not putting them back on. He lay down beside me, wrapped me in his arms, and held me to his heart. I kissed his throat, felt his wildly beating pulse, and lifted my lips to his stubble-covered jaw. He molded my body to his, then smoothed his hand down my hip before pulling the comforter up over me. I was at his mercy, wrapped in his arms, and I knew without asking that he was pleased. His dominance was without question.

“You love this,” he rasped, his voice husky as he stroked my back, letting his hand trail down over my buttocks to the leg draped over his thigh. “You love it when I overpower you.”

I would cry if I opened my mouth. There was too much relief, too much happiness, all of it threatening to flow right out of me if I let it. There was a flood of emotion inside, all the way back to when he was lying in the hospital bed. I would be strong for Sam and keep it to myself.

“Let me have it, J. I know you’re pissed that I wasn’t strong enough not to get hurt. It shook your whole world and made you afraid, because you hate the idea of being vulnerable, of having something taken from you.” His voice was caressing, so gentle, as were his lips on my eyelids, my cheeks, on my forehead. “Here you let me back into your life and I almost go and die on you. Your heart, that you take such pains to keep safe, I nearly annihilate every chance I get, don’t I?”

I swallowed hard, willing him to stop talking.

“Don’t be mad at me anymore. I’m sorry I got hurt. I promise it’ll never happen again. Just don’t leave me. Don’t ever leave me.”

I tried to breathe, but it was so hard.

His fingers traced over my jaw, and then he lifted my chin and bent forward at the same time. He reclaimed my mouth, kissing me deeply. I kissed back with everything I had to give, and he rolled over on top of me, pinning me under him to the bed.

“Goddamn, Jory…I don’t think I’ve ever wanted you this bad.” His voice was low, almost a growl.

“No?” I teased him, biting my lip.

I thought he would fuck me again, and I was ready, but instead, he threw the covers off and bent over me, dragging his tongue up my cock from balls to head.

I nearly came off the bed.

“Good?”

I whimpered loudly as his warm hand closed around my shaft.

“Sam…” I tried to breathe.

“Shhh,” he soothed me as he licked over my length before taking me into his mouth.

It was incredible, being swallowed in tight, moist heat. I felt strong hands on my hips, anchoring me under him, holding me still, and when I got my eyes open and met his gaze, I found his attention on me.

I knew then that without words, I’d told him I was all right. For Sam there was no substitute for action, as for him, words were cheap. He could ask me if I was all right, and I could lie. My body could not. When I shuddered and clutched at his hair, he was happy. I saw the glint in his eyes as his name tore out of me, and afterward, as I lay there, only able to watch him, exhausted beyond anything else, he took a deep, settling breath.

“We should,” I said as my eyes fluttered shut, “get up and see Dane so he’ll know I’m all right and⁠—”

“Close your eyes,” he ordered me. “I’ll tell him you’re fine.”

And that was good, because I could not keep my eyes open a moment longer.

Later, I woke up, and he was moving around the room. I watched him, because that was always a pleasure, and he wasn’t focused on me. He was so intent on whatever he was doing, and then I saw the healing wound on his left side, just below his rib cage, and caught my breath.

“Oh, no, no.” He smiled, climbing back into bed under the comforter that he’d covered me up with. He wrapped me in his arms, crushing me against his chest. “You don’t get to use my recent surgery as a reason not to do me.”

I was shaking. I’d almost lost him.

“I’m not pretty enough for you anymore, huh?” he teased me, his mouth on my collarbone, slowly licking and biting his way up from my shoulder to my jaw. “I’m disfigured.”

“Sam,” I barely got out, “you could have⁠—”