Page 111 of Vexatious Queen

My lip twitched, and Vadin shifted in his seat.

“As I said, I want to explain.”

“I’m not sure there is any explanation that can justify betraying my father, forcing my mother to marry a man she hated, and then making her stay in an abusive situation. You stood by, watching her life crumble to the point that she ran and hid us from you. Did you hit my grandmother? Is that why you didn’t care what happened to your only daughter?”

My anger burned like an out-of-control wildfire in my chest with each word. It took all my effort to sit perfectly still, not raise my voice, and act unaffected by his cruelty.

He sucked in a deep breath, his finger tapping on the tabletop.

“Well, I see your father has wasted no time filling you in on our sordid past.”

“Is it not the truth?”

“It is, but⁠—.”

“There are no buts. I will listen to why you did those things. But if you try to paint my father or my mother in a negative light while you play the victim, you will find yourself outside the Wayward gates very quickly,” I said, seething. “Choose your next words carefully.”

“Alright. You’re right, I did all those things. I would like to explain why, and even if you don’t feel the reason was justified, it was my reason.”

There was a knock at the door, and Nash walked in with a tray of food, coffee that I could smell a mile away, and a stony expression that told me he wasn’t leaving. He placed the tray, loaded with my favorites, down on the table. Then picked up one of the three coffees and sat down beside me, arm draped along the back of my chair.

Vadin looked at Nash, then Myles, and I could see him ruminating on the kiss he’d witnessed earlier and Nash’s behavior now. Let him wonder.

“Vadin was about to explain why he did what he did,” I said to Nash, and then took a sip of my coffee.

It was warm, perfect, and just what I needed.

“Well, then I didn’t miss the entertaining part,” Nash said.

Vadin pointed between the boys.

“May I ask…”

“No,” I said, cutting him off. “You haven’t earned the right to know or understand the inner workings of my life. Now, say what you want to say or leave.”

He picked up the last coffee, tasting it before leaning back in his chair.

“I was a very stubborn, focused, and unemotional man in my youth. The only thing that mattered to me was proving to my father that I deserved to lead the family by any means necessary. Your great-grandfather died when Yuliana was a child, but he made me swear to him that the family name would remain strong and prominent. I was to do whatever it took to achieve those goals. He, too, was not the warmest man.”

Some cycles just loved to repeat themselves, but Nash chose change, and so did Myles. There was strength in breaking the mold that most people never fully understood.

“I took his words to heart. Making him proud and remaining at the top of the business world and in my circles was paramount. Nothing else mattered as much, except for my wife. I loved Renata and never hurt her, at least, not physically. I was not a very good husband otherwise. I’ve committed all the sins. I coveted my brother’s love and stole her. I allowed greed and pride to rule my hand, and when embarrassed, allowed wrath to take over.”

He looked down at his hands, and I believed what he said. All the stories, rumors, or not, had bits of truth. Now, by his own words, he had been that tyrant, maybe still was.

“I’m sure that when I die, I will not be seeing my sweet Renata in heaven. Do you know that is how you got your middle name? Yuliana named you Lilya Ren after her favorite flower and your grandmother.”

I didn’t know that, and it was the first thing he’d said that tugged at my chest.

“Your grandmother was an amazing woman, and she died furious with me. She was so angry and hurt that I had single-handedly destroyed our family. Renata never forgave me. As many times as I begged for her forgiveness, she refused. She said that she would always love me, but she couldn’t forgive my actions that drove our only child away. On her death bed the only thing she wanted was to be able to see Yuliana one more time, but I had no idea where you two were.” He sat back and cleared his throat. “The guilt over not being able to do that one thing for her has haunted me. With all the money and power I’d accumulated and I couldn’t grant my beautiful wife her one wish. That kind of thing will break a man.”

A single tear rolled down his face.

“I held her hand in those final moments and she repeated those words. She loved me, but she could never forgive me. So many lost years with my daughter and with you. It was only when everything I loved was gone that my pride fell, revealing what I really had. My world has crumbled. I am an old man with more money than I can spend in my lifetime, and yet, I have no one other than those I pay to sit with me. Nothing in this world wakes you up to the reality of what you’ve done and lost, as much as that.”

I fought the urge to comfort. His actions were unforgivable, and I hated that he had found a way to get under my skin. He had done this to himself and maybe losing my grandmother really had changed him, but right now it felt like he was using her memory to find my weakness.

“I’m not sure what you want me to say,” I said, and noticed that Nash’s hand had dropped to my shoulder for added support, but he didn’t jump in.