Page 211 of Toxic Kiss

“Patrick, you haven’t been around to see. He’s distant, always busy, and all he cares about is the great Cyrus Vale. It’s disgusting, and I want to vomit.”

Patrick gives me a sad smile.

“Come on, I’ll go inside and get your stuff so you can at least put on some clothes. We can burn them later.”

I nod, and Patrick walks me over to the cars lining the driveway. I’m not sure what else we have to say, but then a question pops into my head.

“When did you know?”

“That I was into guys, or that I loved Cyrus?”

“Both, I guess,” I say with a shrug.

“I questioned it when we were thirteen and I thought Ryan Shaffer was kissable.”

“Ryan Shaffer? Really? Man…we have the same terrible taste in guys, I liked him too. Wasn’t he expelled?”

“Yes. Definitely shit taste in men.”

Patrick smiles widely, and we actually feel normal again. It’s nice to have everything that was hanging between us finally out in the open.

“But he’s no Cy,” I say.

“No, he is not,” Patrick answers as we reach my car. “Look…I really am sorry for everything. What I feel for Cyrus should never have come between our friendship.”

“He has that power. I don’t understand it, but I do the same thing. I see the damaged boy that he hides under the snarky comments and bravado. I keep thinking I can fix him or something. Dumb. So dumb.”

“Lord knows Cyrus needs someone to keep trying to fix him, but I can’t do it. Not at the risk of losing you.”

“He needs to fix himself,” I say, with a sigh.

Patrick grabs me and pulls me into a hug.

“You’re going to get covered in pee.”

“I don’t care. I love you, Haven. You’re truly an incredible person, and I’ll spend the rest of my life making up for not being the same in return.” He pulls back and smiles. “I’m going to bet you right now that one of these days, Cyrus wakes up and realizes what a mistake he’s made and admits how much he loves you.”

“Yeah…I won’t hold my breath.”

“He will…” He smiles as he steps back. “I know it, and I want to be in the wedding party.”

“You’ve had way too much to drink tonight. You’re not even making sense anymore,” I grumble and look away. “That’s never happening.”

“I may have had a few too many, but I’ve seen the way he looks at you when he thinks no one is watching. Trust me, I know cause it’s the way I look at him.”

My cheeks warm, and yet my heart aches for my best friend at the same time. I hate that I understand the pull Cyrus has and how it feels like you're basking in a ray of forbidden sunlight from just a look.

“Cyrus needs some sense knocked into him but he will come around.”

“If you say so.”

“I know I don’t have the right to ask when I haven’t been a good friend to you. But please don’t tell anyone about me, okay?”

“I won’t. I promise. It’s not for me to tell anyone, and I’ll be here whenever you are ready to take that leap.”

“I know. I’ll make things right with you, Haven. I promise,” Patrick says and then jogs off to the house.

I stay hidden behind my car, thinking about everything that just happened, and I can’t wrap my head around any of it. I’m in love with Cyrus, and he treats me like crap. Patrick is in love with Cyrus, who doesn’t even notice his feelings. And Cyrus…well, he can’t even admit he has feelings. We’re all a mess.