Page 51 of A Perfect Disaster

The remark stings because it hits the exact target of my own fears. I’ve been calculating the cost of what happened the whole time.

“Every ground operation has a margin of risk,” I reply. “That’s why we’re in charge.”

“And that’s why we’re assessing what happens when protocols are useless,” Julianne states with icy calm.

Maika leans forward, resting her elbows on the table.

“With all due respect. When a seventy-year-old man collapses on a spiral staircase twenty-four inches wide, the company’s procedures manual is of little use in preventing the group from panicking or in negotiating with the Vatican Gendarmerie.”

Far from being annoyed, Julianne nods slowly.

“Exactly, Maika. That’s what we were getting at.”

I feel confusion gripping me. Arturo swipes a finger across his screen and clears his throat.

“This inspection has revealed two critical factors for the operations center. The first: the coordinator’s ability to improvise and her organic leadership on the ground. Keeping a group of cruise passengers calm at a foreign train station, arranging ticket purchases under pressure, and devising a brilliant escape route in real time.”

Maika doesn’t respond, but I sense the drastic change in her breathing. A storm rages in my own chest, a mix of relief, a flash of envy, and a fear I don’t know where to place.

“The second factor,” Julianne adds, looking at me, “is the flexibility of the officer on board. Her ability to process an unorthodox plan proposed from shore, mobilize the resources of the port of Civitavecchia in record time, and, above all, not block her colleague’s initiative due to excessive bureaucratic zeal.”

I swallow hard, feeling the collar of my uniform tightening around my throat. Maika looks down at her intertwined fingers, and I fix my gaze on the table. If I look at her now, I’ll break.

“The company isn’t looking for automatons who follow a barcode,” Arturo explains. “We’re looking for executives capable of managing crises when the manual becomes useless.”

“You’ve done an impeccable job under pressure, Maika,” Julianne concludes with genuine warmth.

Maika slowly lifts her head, taking the words in.

“Thank you,” she says, with a simplicity that makes my heart ache.

I feel a pang of guilt in my chest. I should have been the first to tell her that. I should have appreciated her, but I was speechless and at a loss for words when I had her right in front of me. God, sometimes I’m unbearable even to myself.

“Helen has done it too,” Maika blurts out suddenly.

I look at her immediately, but she avoids my gaze. She keeps her eyes fixed on the auditors, stating the fact as if it were a mere inventory item.

“If the security department hadn’t pressured the port authority to have that shuttle with its engine running at the Civitavecchia station, my plan would have ended with all of us watching the ship sail away from the dock. We worked as a team.”

I sit motionless in my chair.

Julianne flashes a faint smile.

“We’re fully aware of that. We’ve seen the interaction between the two departments.”

Arturo closes the tablet with a click that breaks the silence.

“And it is precisely because of that intense rivalry between the two of you that we must lay our cards on the table.”

Something in his change of tone sets off alarm bells in my head. My instinct detects the danger before my mind does.

“Due to some last-minute changes, the committee has selected both of you as the two candidates for the new management position. From this moment on, you are entering the evaluation phase. We believe that you, Maika, in particular, are outgrowing the role of entertainment coordinator.”

The hum of the engines seems to die down suddenly. My goal. The goal for which I’ve sacrificed hours of sleep, personal relationships, and years of my life trying to be the most perfect worker in the fleet so that no one could question my ability—it’s turned into a competition, with Maika as my direct rival.

Something dark and very old churns in my stomach. It’s exactly the same dynamic as on our last cruise together, when ambition, attraction, miscalculations, and guilt poisoned everything until it became unbearable.

No. I can’t afford to make the same mistake again.