Page 101 of Our Chaotic Love Affair

I swung again. And again. And again. All the frustration I’d been carrying, about my father, about the business, about walking away from Cleo when every fiber of my being wanted to stay, came pouring out in a series of violent, satisfying crashes. I broke windows. Dented hoods. Shattered headlights. I had no idea how much anger I’d been holding in.

When I finally stopped, I was breathing hard, sweating through my shirt, and my hands hurt from gripping the bat so hard.

Finn was watching me with a satisfied expression. “Feel better?” he asked.

“Actually, a little, yeah.”

“Good.” He walked over and stood beside me, both of us looking at the destruction we’d caused. “Now I’m going to ask you again. What do you want, Cash?”

This time, I didn’t hesitate. “I want my own life,” I said.

Finn threw his head back and laughed. “It’s about fucking time.”

I started laughing too.

“What do I do?” I asked when we’d both calmed down.

“About Dad?”

“About all of it.”

“You figure out what your own life looks like.” He clapped me on the shoulder. “And then you go get it.”

“Just like that?”

“Just like that.”

We spent another twenty minutes beating the shit out of cars. I’d never been a violent person. I didn’t get into fights. But holy hell, there was something to be said for losing my shit in a very violent way.

Finn had ordered a cab and I was actually thinking about paying for another hour.

“We’ll come back,” he said like he had read my mind. “You’re going to be feeling this tomorrow.”

He was probably right. I didn’t care. I felt good. I felt alive. I felt like taking a bat to my whole damn world.

CHAPTER 34

CLEO

Icould have spent the last three weeks wallowing. Feeling sad and shitty about Cash’s heel turn. But thankfully, I hadn’t had the time. It had been all wedding all the time.

I had a wedding to coordinate. A bride to support. A maid of honor speech to write. Dress fittings and flower arrangements and seating charts and a million tiny decisions that Melody needed help making because she was pregnant and overwhelmed and completely, radiantly happy.

And if staying busy meant I didn’t have to sit with the hollow ache in my chest that appeared every time I thought about Cash—which was constantly—then I’d stay busy forever.

I knocked on Melody and Austin’s door with a tote bag full of snacks and a smile. I was pretty confident my fake smile was fooling everyone. I was getting good at it. Thankfully, Melody was so busy with wedding and baby stuff, she wasn’t really paying attention. Normally, I might feel jilted about the lack of my best friend’s attention, but now I was grateful she was distracted.

Austin answered. “The party has arrived.”

“Someone has to keep things interesting around here.” I hugged him and walked inside. “Where’s my girl?”

“Kitchen. Fair warning. She’s in a mood about cheese.”

“Pregnancy mood or regular mood?”

“Does it matter?”

“Fair point.”