Page 108 of Our Chaotic Love Affair

“The wedding. This weekend. I just want to make sure everything is okay.”

“You mean you want to know if we can be professional?” She finally looked at me. “Don’t worry. I’m very good at being professional.”

“I know you are.”

“Then what do you want to talk about?”

Everything. Nothing. How I haven’t slept in three weeks. How I destroyed a car with a baseball bat because I was so angry at myself for walking away from you. How you’re the first thing I think about when I wake up and the last thing before I fall asleep.

“I want to make sure this weekend goes smoothly,” I said instead. “For Austin and Melody. The last thing I want is tension between us that they have to navigate.”

“There’s no tension.”

“Cleo, there’s a little awkwardness.”

“We’re just two friends at a wedding together.” She smiled, but it didn’t reach her eyes. “No need to make it weird.”

Friends. She’d reduced us to friends. Like Rome had never happened.

“Right,” I said. “Friends.”

“Is there anything else?”

Yes. I’m sorry. I was wrong. I miss you so much I can barely function. Please give me another chance.

I opened my mouth. Nothing came out.

She waited. Three seconds. Five. Then she picked up her Diet Coke. “I should go help Melody unpack,” she said. “See you around, Cash.”

She walked past me. Close enough to touch but I didn’t. I watched her go and stood there in the kitchen like an idiot holding a beer I didn’t even want.

“Smooth,” Finn said from the doorway.

“How long have you been standing there?”

“Long enough to witness that tragic display of emotional constipation.” He walked over and took the beer from my hand. “You’re an idiot.”

“Thanks.”

“I’m serious. That woman just gave you an opening the size of the Grand Canyon and you stood there like a deer in headlights.”

“She said we’re friends.”

“She was giving you a chance to correct her.”

“Was she?”

“Oh my god.” Finn set down the beer. “You really are an idiot. How can you be so smart and such a moron?”

“I don’t know what to say to her.”

“Try ‘I’m sorry.’ Try ‘I was wrong.’ Try literally anything except standing there looking like someone kicked your puppy.”

I ran a hand through my hair. “It’s more complicated than that.”

“Why?”

“Leave it alone.”