Page 88 of The Fire Line

Jay had trusted Harris with the truth of what he wanted, and Harris had repaid him with a lie.

The story Jay was telling eventually ran out. He reached for his beer, still smiling faintly at whatever memory he had just finished describing.

Harris rubbed one thumb against the label of his own bottle. “There’s somethin’ I need to tell you.”

Jay glanced over, his smile fading. “Okay.”

Harris looked down at the bottle. “At the lookout, I told you I’d done this before.”

A beat passed.

“Yeah.”

“Hadn’t.”

Silence followed.

Jay’s expression changed slowly, amusement giving way to concentration as he reconsidered what Harris had just told him. His gaze moved over Harris’s face as though looking for something he had missed the first time.

“You’d never been with a man?”

“No.”

Jay leaned back slightly. “The first time we kissed?”

“First time.”

“And everything after?”

Harris shook his head.

For a moment, Jay said nothing. He looked toward the floor, then back at Harris, replaying the lookout in some private sequence Harris could almost see happening behind his eyes.

“Jesus Christ.”

He stood and crossed a few steps before turning back. The movement put distance between them that had not been there a minute ago, and Harris felt it immediately.

“You should have told me.”

“I know.”

“Do you?”

“Yeah. I know.”

Jay dragged a hand through his hair. He did not look furious so much as unsettled, which somehow felt worse. “That information would have mattered to me.”

“Didn’t want it to.”

Jay stared at him. “That wasn’t your decision.”

Harris’s jaw tightened. He knew that. Had known it almost as soon as the lie left his mouth. Knowing it now did nothing to make explaining himself easier.

“Didn’t want you treating me like I didn’t know what I wanted.”

“You didn’t know everything you wanted.”

“Knew enough.”