Page 84 of Where Broken Wings Fly

“Nothing. Nothing! I was just pointing out the fact that the only way we’re going to be able to defeat the Rachainn is by coming together as one, which is what they ultimately want.”

“You’re sympathising with the Rachainn, aren’t you?” Aisling gasped and Rory motioned for her to keep it down.

“No. All I’m saying, all I’ve been trying to say is that for someone like me, who hasn’t grown up in this world, some of your… rules seem strange. And while I don’t agree with their methods for demanding change, I can sort-of understand the desire for a change.”

They looked at me like I had six heads or rabies.

I waved them off. “Forget about it.”

~

I couldn’t eat. Everyone had food on the way to their mouths, water in little canteens tipped into the air, and I couldn’t fathom the idea of eating. My stomach hadn’t stopped spinning since we left Choilltean, and every time our group grew in size it would take everything in me not to throw up on the grassy hills of Cluaineach.

Instead, I resorted to sitting several feet away from my friends, listening to the small conversation made between all the pixies around me. A group sitting just behind me were discussing battle strategies, the one behind them were glittering some nonsense about Prince Raegan having a hidden consort, and the group beside them started to contribute saying that Prince Tadgh was going to duel Raegan for this secret pixie’s hand in marriage. It was utter shit.

But my friends had their own discussion. They decided to indulge Aisling and Rory, entertaining them with conversation as if they didn’t hate one another on a level that I would truly never understand. Rory had asked Niamh what she thought of his home — Cluaineach — to which she had to admit she’d never been within the kingdom. Which spurred the conversation into her hidden truth that she was forced to present everyone with — she really wanted to travel Saoghal, one day. To that, Shea did what Shea did best and ruined the mood by telling her no place would ever be as magnificent as Choilltean. The conversation died not long after.

Which was when Raegan appeared in front of me, his boots swallowing my sight as he frowned down his nose at me.

“Making friends I see.” He wanted to grin, but nothing made it through as he judged the distance between myself and my friends.

Urram hopped down from my shoulder, his beak scraping along the ground as he worked at grinding it against some stones. Gliocas hovered over from where he had been perched on Raegan, joining his companion in a quiet screaming match.

“Do you need something, Raegan?”

Whatever glistening of humour he had in his eyes faded away as his frown furthered across his face. “You’re regressing.”

I knew he was right, in a way. It’s funny how you never truly understand what that feeling is in your chest until someone that knows you points it out. Then it makes sense, all of a sudden. It makes sense why the air feels denser, why each breath feels more difficult to make, why you can’t summon a genuine smile to save your life.

But I hated that he was right. I hated that not only was it that obvious, but that it was Raegan who noticed when no one else had.

“So you don’t need anything? Great, can you please move, you're blocking the sun.”

He wasn’t, of course. If anything, Raegan was the sun. It partnered with him like rainbows partnered with glass, spreading rays of brilliance across the earth.

In an attempt to be funny or further my budding disdain, he threw his hands up and pretended to retreat. I watched his back as he strode away from me, right up until he paused at Killian’s side and no longer was capable of holding my interest. Content to rot beneath the one thing that was supposed to illuminate my life, I looked back across the horizon and plucked at the small roots of grass beneath me.

Until Killian arrived, seconds later. Wordlessly, he dropped down next to me, crossing his legs over one another and letting out a sigh that must’ve been as old as he was.

“Killian, what–”

“Shush—” he lifted a finger to his lips, winking at me, “—listen.”

There was nothing to listen to. The chatter of the pixies behind me had become more of a buzz than a distinct noise, and the faint chitter of creatures as they rolled and dozed across the meadow was decreasing by the second. Like I had felt for so many years, I simply did not have the energy to explain that to him.

“Do you hear it?”

“All I hear is you,” I snarled, but immediately regretted it. Killian had been nothing but kind to me, he didn’t deserve to earn the brunt end of the fouling of my soul. “Just because Raegan sent you over here, doesn’t mean you need to try and do whatever you’re trying to do. I just want to be alone, Killian.”

When he didn’t immediately respond, it confirmed my suspicions and I rolled my eyes at the Prince, whose back was still to me and wouldn’t have seen any way.

Killian spread his arms to either side as he tipped his head back. “This is Saoghal, Olivia.”

Pretending to glance around, I feigned surprise. “Oh, that’s where we are.”

But Killian wore his inner joy like a shield and my words just simply bounced off of it. “We are pixies. We belong here.”

“Is there a point that you’re trying to make?”