Page 11 of Anything But Lonely

But then Talia and I went to pick up Crew from my sister’s house, and I said my goodbyes to them all before starting my drive back here to Nashville. And the entire drive, I realized that having two more legs of this tour, traveling every other day, and bringing my four-year-old son along for it all was next to impossible to do all by myself.

Granted, I know the guys and our crew would help—Mia too if I need her—but we are all out here to do our jobs. I can’t expect any of them to pick up my slack.

“I haven’t figured it out yet,” I tell them, rubbing my hands against my pants, my body rocking back and forth. “Aside from the fact that he’s coming on tour with us.”

This prompts a plethora of reactions from the guys—widened eyes from Eddie, a “damn” from Theo, and a “hell yeah” from Silas.

All three guys are married, but the reactions prove that Silas is the only one without kids—Theo and Eddie immediately understand what it means being on tour with a child, and Silas is none the wiser.

“What about school?” Theo asks.

I run a hand through my hair. “He starts school full-time next fall, so I need to make sure he’s ready for Kindergarten by then.”

“What’s your plan for that?” Eddie asks, but before I can say more—or admit that I have no fucking clue—we hear footsteps coming down the hallway just outside the greenroom, the music no longer sounding from stage as the guys from Sugarcoated Lies peek their heads in the way they always do after they finish their set. We’ve been touring with them for a few months now, but I can still sense the nerves coming from them—like they don’t quite know how to act around us yet.

“How’d it go?” I ask Liam, the lead singer, giving him and the three other guys a chance to come in, putting a pause on the current conversation as I stand up to join them by the door.

“Great,” he says, sweat lining his forehead, his blonde hair damp and cheeks red. There’s a huge smile on his face, the same way there always is when the kid gets off stage.

“There were a couple people out there singing along to some of our songs,” Kai, the guitarist, says from over Liam’s shoulder. The same eager smile on his face, like he can’t contain his excitement. Eddie, Theo, and Silas join us, their lips all curved in smiles like proud dads, and I know my face shows the same.

“Damn, that’s awesome, guys,” I say, lightly bumping Liam's shoulder with my fist as Eddie squeezes Kai’s shoulders and Theo and Silas give the other two band members high fives.

I couldn’t help the mentor role I fell into with these guys, ever since I was at Lenny’s one night last year, getting a drink and catching up with Mia and some of her friends, and I saw Sugarcoated Lies performing.

They were on the same makeshift stage Cross My Heart used to perform on, and they had a sound that instantly spoke to me—telling me that they had something special. Their sound seamlessly blended glossy pop-rock hooks with emotional weight that you hear in Midwest emo bands. There was something raw about the way they fused together this confident energy with something that was distinctively theirs.

After their set, I introduced myself and was honored to hear that they were inspired by Cross My Heart’s sound. It only took a couple meetings with the label and the rest of the band seeing them perform for us all to know that they were perfect for our last tour.

The guys all fall into a conversation about the crowd and the stage when I feel my phone buzz a few times in my pocket.

Talia

Hi! I know you’re about to go on, so feel free to ignore this until after the show!

The agency wants to change my flight to Monday

I’m sorry it’s sooner than we planned

Are you guys still set to be in Atlanta by then? I can see if they can fly Daniel and me out from there after dropping off Crew with you?

Good luck tonight!

She sends a picture of Crew in his Cross My Heart T-shirt, smiling at the camera so big that his eyes are closed, and it momentarily helps me forget what her other messages entail.

Four days doesn’t make that much of a difference in the grand scheme of things, but now I only have tomorrow and Monday to figure out what the fuck I’m going to do.

Thanks for the photo

Give him a kiss goodnight for me

And yes, we’ll be there—I’ll send you the hotel info tomorrow

I let out a sharp exhale, one loud enough to get the attention of Liam.

“Everything okay?” he asks as I slide my phone into my back pocket.

I nod, clearing my throat. “Yeah, it’s just my ex-wife.”