Page 13 of Firefly Embers

He walked with me out to the dirt corral as I watched Izzy warm Oakley up. We leaned against the thick metal fencing, and I nodded at him to continue.

“Your mother was the only one who never gave up on me. When everyone else said I was too much to handle, she kept coming back. One night after your grandpop had lit into me good about getting my life on track, I got to drinking real heavy and almost got behind the wheel of the car. Son, she looked me dead in the eyes and said, ‘I’d miss you if you were gone.’” He sniffed, pushing back the tears that threatened to fall. Even though it’s said that cowboys don’t cry, when it comes to our women, that shit’s a lie.

“She saved my life that night. I was ready to risk it all because I felt like everything was falling apart around me. But this spitfire of a woman telling me that she would miss me brought me back from the darkness enough to try. After that night, I never let her go.”

I kicked my booted foot against the metal bars we were leaning on outside of the corral. I could feel the emotion welling up inside of me, and I pushed it down, forcing it back into the neat little box I had it stored in.

“Son, that girl over there,” he subtly pointed to where Ray had ridden off, no longer in view, “that girl sees your darkness and still thinks the sun shines out of your ass, no matter how far up it you have your head shoved.”

I groaned, dangling my hands over the top of the fencing and dipping my head between my shoulders. We had been over this so many times, and no one was getting the hint.

“I can’t go there, Pops. She’s my best friend, and if something ruined that friendship…” I couldn’t even vocalize the fear.

Thoughts of a life without Ray had my heart racing as sweat dampened my brow. The very thought of not having her in my life caused such a visceral reaction that I gripped my hands harder on the rungs to keep them from shaking.

“I’m afraid, boy, you’re already there, whether or not you want to admit it. You love that girl, and she loves you. The question is, are you going to do something about it, or are you going to let her walk away?”

I sighed as he patted me on the shoulder and walked back toward the stables, whistling, without a care in the world. Acting like he hadn’t just set an explosive at my feet and lit the fuse.

I was going to do absolutely nothing about the fact that I was in love with Rayna Cortez because she could do so much better. She deserved better. But would I actually be able to watch her walk away?

RAY

I came back from my trail ride refreshed and clear-headed. The winding slope through the forest had calmed me in a way that was hard to explain. The steady cadence of Sunset’s hooves tamping down the dirt served as a metronome to even out my heartbeat, and with each step farther into the forest, I felt the weight of life lifting off my shoulders.

Pressure like I’d never felt before had been weighing me down over the course of the last month.

Dad had been working overtime, trying to make up for the work he’d gotten behind on while out on administrative leave. That left me as the sole parental figure to three teenagers. I did my best, but I couldn’t hold a candle to the woman my mother had been or the man my father was, nor did I want to parent teenagers when I had barely crested out of those years myself.

Life wasn’t fair, but I had only one life, and I refused to let my baby siblings grow up too fast, as I had been forced to.

Lucia and Sofia, the twins, kept me on my toes. If they weren’t sneaking out, they were blasting pop music from their room or attempting to give me a heart attack with their wardrobe choices.

At least Benny, the other teen occupying the house, was quiet and respectful. At seventeen, he was more responsible than any of the other kids by a long shot, even me at times. Between football, track, and swimming, we barely saw him. When we did, he was eating us out of house and home, growing like a weed and focusing on his endless schoolwork.

Although at fifteen and seventeen, the kids were pretty self-sufficient, ‌they still couldn’t be left to their own devices, and with Dad working nonstop, someone had to step in.

Which left me, the oldest, to pick up the slack when Dad needed help.

As Sunset and I trotted our way back to the stables, I felt the prickling sensation of eyes on me. I ignored Wade’s gaze, feigning indifference, even though the mere thought of his eyes trailing over the slopes of my body as I used every muscle to stay atop the horse sent sparks straight to my core.

I can only imagine the visual, as I’d seen him in the same scenario time and time again during his rodeo days and riding around the ranch.

Watching him on a horse was ‌sweet torture and an aphrodisiac blended into the form of a powerful cowboy riding a majestic horse in the tightest jeans known to man.

Pulling the reins to stop Sunset, I dismounted with the grace of a manatee. No matter how many times I went out for a ride, I always ended up feeling the effects of it for days.

I wasn’t put on a horse as soon as I came out of the womb like the Daniels boys, nor was I a natural like Izzy. I rode occasionally when I could, which often left me sore and waddling around the house for a couple of days as my muscles attempted to heal from the relentless beating they took.

I had somehow ended up with a couple of free hours between clients this afternoon, so I took the opportunity when it presented itself.

I surely hadn’t come down to the ranch hoping to catch the eye of a certain broody cowboy who was currently slinging hay like it owed him rent money.

Not. At. All.

“I can feel you staring, Sunshine,” he called from the large stable doorway.

With expert ease, he sliced the twine that held together the dry hay, his back to me as he spoke.