Page 86 of The Temptation of Roan Island

I clench my fists. If one more person hints at studying my wife like a lab rat, I’ll study their insides with my claws.

“You know what we need to do.”

There’s a shuffling stomp of feet getting closer, so I stroll to Pippa’s side just as the door opens.

“Send a telegraph—” Dr. Reter’s thought cuts off when he sees us, face slightly pale. “Mr. and Mrs. Roan, what are you still doing here?”

Pippa forces half a smile. “I’ve always wanted to see a typing machine.”

“Ah.” He nods.

“Thank you for your time, Dr. Reter.” Before he can say anything else or get any more suspicious that we lingered, I take Pippa’s hand and guide her down the hall and straight out of the building to the waiting carriage.

We barely make it inside before Pippa demands I tell her what I heard. “He’s alive, right? Dr. Reter was lying, wasn’t he?”

My hearts break, crushed by the uncertainty in her voice. After all she’s been through over the last few weeks, I don’t want to give her false hope. I might have suspicions about Dr. Reter’s claims, but I don’t have proof that Tobias is, in fact, alive.

“They discussed why we were there, but⁠—”

“Did they say anything about Tobias? Where is he?”

I draw her onto my lap, trying to offer comfort with my arms while I decide how to respond. “I’m sorry, love. They’re hiding something, or at least it’s clear they don’t want us looking into this more. But all they said about Tobias was⁠—”

“Don’t.” Her eyes jump to meet mine. Hollow, as if the spirit that’s kept her going has been scooped out. She offers me a shake of her head before her attention slips back to the window.

“Pippa.” I hold her tighter, trying to offer comfort with my arms as I kiss her temple. The carriage bumps over the cobblestone streets. Tears slip slowly down Pippa’s cheeks, and I brush each one away with my thumbs.

“I don’t know how much longer I can keep hoping,” she whispers, like she’s telling a secret she’s scared to admit. “I have to hope. The alternative is… but… I don’t know…” Her tears come in waves, and she buries her head in my shoulder.

“I know, love.” I tighten my grasp around her. “Hold on just a little longer for me, okay?”

She nods, and I curse the ridiculous men who’ve stolen her happiness. Whatever is going on at The Sanatorium, I’m going to uncover it. One way or another. Starting with talking to Mrs. Darning.

36

PIPPA

From my room at the Roan Estate, I watch a spring breeze flutter across petals of blooming flowers in the beds below. The landscape has exploded in a riot of color in the month we’ve been away. I’m certain it’s due to Ruby, in addition to the normal ebb and flow of nature and the seasons. She’s been working tirelessly to change the foundation of this place, to make Roan Island a home. And she’s succeeding.

But Tobias will never see it. My throat closes up, and I sniff.

The view is a contrast to the devastation and desolation inside me. At The Sanatorium it was easy to deny what Dr. Reter said about Toby’s death, but now it’s much harder. Nothing else explains why we couldn’t find him, why he’s not here with me now.

“You need to eat, Pippa.” Ruby’s voice is gentle, but firm. “To keep up your strength.”

I turn my head from the window to look at her. She’s standing an arm’s length away, her face filled with concern. I don’t know when she arrived. Did I let her in? How long has it been since Shemaiah left me here in my rooms?

Ruby walks to my side. “Shemaiah’s worried. He wanted me to check on you.”

“Where is he?”

“He’s with Noah and asked me to make sure you have everything you need.” Ruby tilts her head to study me.

I make a derisive noise. I can’t have everything I need. Everything I need is Tobias. And Shemaiah. And they’re not here.

“Shemaiah told me about your son,” Ruby says softly. “I’m so sorry. I can’t begin to understand what you’re feeling, but I don’t think shutting out those who care about you is the right course of action. When my sister died⁠—”

I whirl on her.