Page 104 of The Addendum

I shifted in my seat, suddenly uncomfortable at his statement. “Well, it’s a little more complicated than that.”

“But in a nutshell, that’s it.”

I sighed and pulled my legs up to my chest. “I suppose so.”

He shook his head. “Ashley, love, I don’t understand you.”

“I was angry. Grace and I seem to rub each other the wrong way. And it pissed me off Richard would do that. What an invasion of privacy.” I sniffed.

“Incredibly generous, though.”

I ignored his words. “How would he even get my banking information?”

He shook his head. “If I were taking a guess, I would assume Reid Matthews got it for him. Or maybe he got Halton to find it.” He shook his head. “Ashley, are you angry that he paid off your debt, or angry that by doing so, maybe it makes you think he’s not such a bad guy?”

“Don’t be ridiculous.”

He studied me for a moment. “I’m going to tell you what I think. Once I do, you’ll probably ask me to leave, and that’s fine. But I’m going to say it.”

“Say what?”

“I think you’re deliberately trying to sabotage your family’s attempts at kindness and trying to get to know you.”

“How ridiculous. Why would I do that?” I snapped.

“Because,” he replied quietly, leaning over and running his fingers down my cheek. “You’re scared. You want to get to know them. You want to belong, but you’re afraid they might reject you, so you’re rejecting them first. And I stick by my theory you are afraid that by liking them, you’re being disloyal to your mom’s memory.”

I stared at him in silence, his words echoing in my head. I thought of Heather’s plea. Of the hurt I saw flash on Richard’s face when I accused him of trying to bribe me. Of how Grace had extended the offer of coffee. But by accepting Richard’s gift, didn’t that give Grace ammunition? To prove I was in this for his money?

I said so to Luc, who shook his head.

“Anyone who knows Richard knows how he looks after his family. I’m not shocked he did that. The bottom line is that you can’t worry about Grace’s reaction. The issue is hers, not yours, love. She is just reacting.” He paused. “So are you. You look for reasons to fight that might not be there.”

I furrowed my brow as I thought over his words. I had entered all my interactions with them in a combative fashion. Ready to walk, prepared to dislike them. And I compared their life to mine every chance I got. Everything they had that my mom and I didn’t.

Oh my God. Was Luc right?

I swallowed, pulling my legs tighter. “Well, I think I pushed them all away for good now.”

He shook his head. “Give them and yourself some space. Time is a great healer.”

“Not sure in this case.”

He hunched closer, his gaze intense. “Ashley, I love you.”

“I love you,” I replied.

“Step back and think hard over this. You have always wanted a family. You’ve been given one. Try to move past your anger and accept them for what they are now. People wanting, trying, to get to know you.”

“I don’t know if I can.”

“Then I think you’ll be missing out on some great people. Some wonderful memories.”

I wasn’t sure how to reply.

He kissed me, his lips pressing on mine with tenderness. “Try, love. Let them get to know the Ashley I love so much. They’ll love you too.” He paused. “I think they want to, but you keep stopping them.”

His words stayed with me for days.