Page 41 of Last Slice of Pie

“Distance does that.”

Swallowing, I remain quiet; I don’t know what to say. This is poking into territory I don’t want to visit with her, but I also know this is where her insecurities with me lie. It was definitely easier not having a vision of how she lives day to day, because now I want to be a part of it, but for her, this vision is a hard reality of a life I didn’t include her in.

Watching her get lost in her own thoughts, I walk into the kitchen, over to the refrigerator, and pull out the grouper I picked up early this morning.

“I think I also thought you would have a roommate. It’s very quiet here.”

I hear what she’s not saying: lonely. Sometimes it is, but I’ve always been focused and disciplined. Noise distracts me from doing what I need to do.

“Well, I sort of do have a roommate.” I rinse the fish and then pat it down.

“What do you mean?” She turns to face me.

I wash my hands, walk out of the kitchen, and turn to go up the stairs, knowing she’s following. At the top, there is a small landing and then two doors, one for my room, which is open, and the other for his. Opening the second door, we walk in together, and I hear her gasp.

“James has his own bedroom here?”

“Yep.”

James and I lived together all through college. When he left for the Air Force, we saw no reason for him to part with his things, and I wanted him to always feel like he had a home with me.

“I knew he stayed with you when he’s home on leave, but I didn’t expect this.” She glances back at me, and I shrug my shoulders.

“It was just as easy to have the movers pack his stuff up along with mine instead of worrying about an alternative.”

She walks into the room and picks up a photo he keeps of the two of them and GiGi. It was taken right before he left for the Air Force, and I’m embarrassed to admit how often I’ve stared at grown-up Lexi in the photo.

“Why didn’t he tell me?” she asks without looking at me.

“I don’t think it was intentional. He enlisted, and I offered.”

She nods to acknowledge she heard me.

James and I both felt the same when we were eighteen. Neither one of us wanted to live in the small town of Oakwood, and we were adamant about getting out. He wanted to see the world, and he is, from the sky as a pilot.

“Thank you . . .” She trails off. Her tone is a little sad. I worried she would feel that way, but she’s so selfless that I know deep down she’s happy for James, and for me.

Leaving her with her thoughts, I quickly dip into my room to change out of the suit and into something more casual. When I return, she walks over as I stand in the doorway, steps into me, and wraps her arms around my waist to hug me. I hold on to her for a second longer than needed, because I’m desperate to be near her. Between us, her stomach growls, and I chuckle.

“Let’s go. I need to feed you.” I kiss the top of her head and loosen my hold.

“I won’t say no to that,” she replies as she pulls away. There is a little bit of emotion left on her face, around the corners of her eyes when she smiles, but she’s reconciling with herself, and I love her resiliency. “Are you cooking?”

“Of course I’m cooking.” Taking her hand, I walk her back down the stairs and into the kitchen. “You just wait. You’re going to be amazed by my grilling skills.”

“Grilling skills.” She laughs.

I nod as I open the refrigerator and pull out a platter of vegetables I’ve already chopped, placing it on the counter next to the fish.

“Wow, look at that.” She beams.

“See? You’re not the only one with a talent for food.”

“I’m happy to see this. It looks delicious.” She leans down to smell the fish. It’s fresh off the boat, so it shouldn’t have a strong odor.

“Well, let’s just hope I don’t burn it.”

“You won’t.” She smiles.