Page 27 of Wildflowers and Wide Receivers

Jonah

It’s been two days since I last saw Sophie and I’m annoyed with myself about how much I think about her. It feels wrong and useless knowing she’s with someone else, but I can’t seem to stop. She will forever be my the one who got away, and for that alone I seem to be torturing myself. I have no one to blame but myself, but even if I did try to rewrite history, I’m not sure that I would or could have changed anything. That was such a horrible time in my life. Emotionally, I was spent with what I had, and to top it off, that was the year we lost the Super Bowl and Jack to an injury. At the time, Jack was a beloved starting wide receiver on our team. He was tackled in such a way that it blew out his knee to where he had to be carted off and it ended his career.

Everyone in that stadium felt the shock and horror of that injury. Some nights when I lie in bed I still see it play out from the replay on the jumbotron. Talk about my worst fear coming true.

But besides that, there is the absolute situation that Vivi and I are a package deal. A package that I think is amazing, but others might not see it that way. And reality is, Sophie and I had only spent one night together. There was no real foundation, we weren’t even friends, I just really really liked her. From the moment I saw her, I wanted to know her, it’s just too bad I didn’t get the chance. Which has me turning full circle again. She's the one that got away.

Dating is hard. And whereas it wasn’t scary before, now it is. I don’t even know if I’m ready for it, but with the increasing thoughts of Sophie, even though I know she’s unavailable, I might be getting closer. Or maybe it’s just that I want to be close to her. Who knows. No one has piqued my interest in years, but her. Only her.

“I saw her on Saturday,” I unconsciously blurt out to my friends, and then cringe. While I love my friends, they can be a bit meddlesome and gossipy. It’s hard to keep secrets on a team like ours, everyone talks to everyone and everyone is up in everyone’s business.

“Saw who?” Sully asks. His feet are propped up on the ottoman in front of him as we watch golf highlights on ESPN and eat barbecue. I put a pork shoulder on the smoker yesterday and let it slow cook all night and most of today. It makes the most delicious pulled pork, which is something that Vivi will eat if I leave the sauce off it.

I wasn’t surprised that in addition to Tyler, Sully and Camden made their way over after I mentioned it in the locker room.

“You know who,” Tyler says, smirking at me and taking a bite of his sandwich. Add in some Publix baked beans, potato salad, mac and cheese for my mini, and a bag of chips, this is the perfect meal.

Yesterday, Tyler took Vivi and me out on the boat, and of course Vivi hit him up for a candy bar in which she innocently announced that she’d already sold some to Camille and Sophie. His eyes widened at this information, but I didn’t engage. Even though he tried to coax it out of me, several times, in fact. That is until now.

“The hot doctor?” Sully asks, looking at me curiously.

Since our run-in back at Vivi’s appointment, the guys have affectionately coined her the hot doctor. At first I was pissed and repeatedly told them to knock it off, but all that did was fuel them even more.

“Yep.”

My heart rate picks up a little just mentioning her out loud and I glance out into the small backyard to find Vivi and Molly. It’s been a week and I swear this dog is the playmate she’s never had. The two of them are inseparable.

“And?” he probes, taking another bite of his sandwich.

I shrug. “She bought a candy bar from Vivi.”

His face lights up and I can’t help but to reciprocate and crack a smile of my own. Tyler’s looking at me like he knows the answers to all the world’s problems, but Camden says nothing. He’s always been more of the “listen more and talk less” kind of guy.

“By the look on your face, I’m assuming she gave you more than just her money.”

“No, but . . .” I don’t know what to say. There really isn’t anything.

“But what?” Camden chimes in, standing to go wander back into the kitchen for more food.

“They’re trying to ask if you got her number.” Tyler rolls his eyes.

“I do have her number,” I tell them, already knowing how this conversation is going to go. And if Tyler opens his mouth to tell them that I’ve actually had it longer, I might just have to kill him.

“Have you texted her yet?” Sully asks.

I don’t know why it’s so hard to tell them this, but it is. “No.”

The three of them look at each other, and then they look at me. I’m so uncomfortable, I want to kick each of them out of my house. I know I asked for this by blurting out that I saw her, but still.

“Why not? You should have texted her that night,” Sully says, looking at me and pinning me with his knowing blue eyes.

The thing about Sully, he’s a tank of a guy. To be a defensive tackle and on the line, you have to be. For all intents and purposes, his appearance makes him kind of scary, but when he looks at you with those clear blue eyes, it’s almost calming. They give off kind vibes and instantly that scary shifts to big teddy bear.

“I know. I’m just not sure what to say.”

“How old are you, five?” Camden asks. “Never mind, I take that back, even five-year-olds know how to talk to a pretty girl,” he says, plopping back down on the couch with a full plate of food.

“Yeah, and word on the street is that you’ve seen her several times now,” Sully says on the sly, meanwhile Tyler snickers.