Page 85 of Wildflowers and Wide Receivers

“Do you still remember your mom?” she asks me.

“Of course I do. I don’t remember all the little day-to-day things we used to do, but I remember how she used to brush my hair, just like your mom braided yours. I remember how she used to tuck me in at night, how I felt when she hugged me, and I love to look at her pictures to see her smile.”

“I don’t want to forget them,” she says, tears from her innocent little heart spilling over.

“Oh, sweetheart, you won’t,” I tell her as I pull her into my arms, and some of the tension in her back leaves.

Hugs with children are such an important thing. I specifically remember a lecture that I attended which spoke about hugging and child development. The benefits are endless from emotional bonds, reduced stress, increased self-esteem, as well as boosting their immune systems.

At this, Jonah gets up, walks around the island, and enfolds us both in his arms. I know what we look like, and I definitely know what this feels like, I’m just not sure what I’m supposed to do from here. My heart aches for all of us, especially for Vivi, so I do the thing where I take the moment and lighten it.

“You know what we’ve just made, don’t you?”

Both of them look at me.

“A Vivi sandwich.”

Vivi smiles, and Jonah tightens his arms for another long beat before he releases us, and then his stomach growls.

We both laugh.

I guess we did work up an appetite earlier.

“I’m thinking cookies aren’t going to be enough for him. I mean, look at him.” I eye him up and down. He’s still wearing what he wore to my house and still looks good. “He’s kind of huge.”

Vivi giggles again. This time, it’s noticeable that some of the dark cloud that was hanging over her is gone.

“Can we make grilled cheese?” she asks him.

“Of course, but you’d better make me two.” He smiles at her, and I melt just like the cheese.

After dinner, cookies, and more Flipper, Vivi and I make our way upstairs to get her ready for bed. Other than sneaking in and out of Jonah’s room, I haven’t been inside any others, including hers. Which is absolutely beautiful. I shouldn’t have expected anything less, but what I find takes my breath away. The room is painted a pale pink, she has two windows on the outside wall draped in gauzy white, her canopy bed sits against one wall, and the other has a huge floor-to-ceiling painting that is a field of wildflowers. It’s bright and stunning, and just gorgeous.

As Vivi starts changing into her pajamas, I take the time to look around at the rest of the details. She has the standard things I would expect to see in a little girl’s room—a dollhouse, a craft table and easel, a soft pink rug, a bookshelf loaded with books, a ton of stuffed animals, she has a pretty chandelier, there are a few dance posters, but it’s the framed photos on the wall that leads to the bathroom that have caught my eye.

“Come here and tell me about these,” I say to her once she’s dressed.

Vivi walks over and I pick her up. She lays her head on my shoulder as she looks at them.

“That’s my mom and dad.”

“I recognize them from the pictures downstairs. You look like the perfect mixture of the two of them.”

She doesn’t say anything. She just stares at the photos.

“How old are you here?” I ask, pointing at the first one.

“One,” she says sweetly.

There are six pictures. Four in a row and then two are underneath them. It’s easy to see that it’s one picture for every year starting at one. What’s beautiful about the pictures is that each family photo is taken in a different field of wildflowers. The first four are of Vivi and her parents, and the next two are of her and Jonah.

“This is such a great idea. Whose idea was this?”

“I don’t know,” she says. “But Uncle Jonah thought we should keep them going. That’s why he’s in those. He planned trips for us both summers.”

“That sounds like a super fun tradition. And I bet it was your mom’s idea. From everything you and Jonah have said about her, she sounds like she would be sentimental and artistic.”

“She painted those, too.” Vivi shifts her weight and points toward the large painting of the wildflowers.