Page 67 of Fractured Heart

My ears ring and his words barely register. He waits for my response and when I don’t give one, he goes right back to shouting.

“Walk away, Roonie Hill. Understand?” He shifts his weight forward. “I want you to walk out that door and never come back. And if I ever see your face here again, you’ll regret it.”

He glares at me, but I can’t move. I’m frozen in place with my back against the wall and my heart hammering in my ears.

“Go!” Silas shouts, his tone so loud and menacing that it breaks through my terror. And I break into a run.

Chapter 31

Unthinking, unfeeling, I race out of the rehearsal room. The door slams behind me and my heart nearly bursts out of my chest. Between my eyes stinging with unshed tears and the burning fear, all I can do is run: down the hall, then down the stairs, and through the echoing lobby.

Silas doesn’t chase after me. His words do. They ring through my head, over and over, stuck on a torturous loop. I’m not going to hit you! That pathetic excuse for a song! Did Vibrato Lap send you?

I’ve never heard of Vibrato Lap, but I know enough about a cappella to figure out it’s a rival group. Is my song really so bad that Silas would think it was meant to sabotage them?

When I’m finally free of the Beckett Hall an overcast sky greets me. It forecasts rain, but the campus is still littered with students. They go about their day, living their dreams. Too bad I’ll never get to live mine.

Father was right—I’ll never amount to anything. Silas was right—I’m not good enough to be here. Everyone who made fun of me in high school was right—I’ll always just be that weird girl who’d start singing in class.

Worst of all, I was right—I don’t deserve a happy ending.

With a whimper, I stumble down the steps. If I were Cinderella, I’d at least lose a slipper, but my ballet flats hang on tight, mocking me. I try to turn that into a song and escape into a fairy tale, but someone set up speakers right outside the building. They blast Latin music and the song in my head fizzles out and disappears.

I need to get out of here.

I turn toward the dorms and stop. I can’t go back there after the way Silas warned me off. Even if I did, what would be the point? The guys are probably still getting takeout, talking about the failed rehearsal that was all my fault. I wouldn’t be surprised if they regret putting their faith in me. If they want me gone.

My heart sinks.

For a brief instant, the three of them made me happy. They made it seem like it was okay for me to hum and randomly break into song. They convinced me that my fairy tale creations were more than just some silly tunes. They even showed me that life could be more than endless chores and fruitless attempts to please Father.

They were wrong.

My only choice now is to go home. I thought that part of my life was over, that Father would never lay a hand on me again, but what else can I do? Maybe if I can stop myself from singing long enough to serve Father’s meals, it won’t be so bad. It’s the best I can hope for, since I’m not good at anything else.

There’s no point reapplying to college next year and I’ll never get a half-decent job. I should be grateful to have a place to live and food on the table. Assuming Father lets me come home.

I break into a run, trying to escape my own thoughts.

Pulsating beats mask the sound of my pounding footsteps as I race across campus. A group of dancers expertly executing a routine stumble at the sight of me. Everyone I pass stops to stare. Even the small group of students decked out for a renaissance fair gape at me.

Cursed mermaids with flowing rivers of tears don’t belong at LUV Academy.

I run faster, down the same path Tate and I took on our way into campus. It had felt so magical then, like the entire scene had been pulled straight out of a fairy tale. Now, I finally see it for what it really is. Grim, like Charles’s book of fairy tales.

All the little shops have lost their luster. The grass is covered with litter—candy wrappers, discarded scraps of paper, and…is that a used condom? Buildings loom over me, grim giants shaking their fists and urging me to leave. Even they don’t think I belong here.

I push through the campus gates and enter the forest. The sky turns dark and a lone raindrop falls from the sky, urging me to move. It’s joined by another, then another. By the time I exit the forest, I’m trembling from the cold. My thin silk blouse provides almost no protection from the elements.

Like the day I left home, the streets are empty, and the houses lit up. This time, seeing the happy families through the windows doesn’t just remind me of my mom, it makes me think of the guys.

I wish I was a good enough songwriter, so I could have stayed with them. If I had just managed to get them through rehearsal, maybe…but there’s no use thinking about it. I’ll never be the kind of songwriter their a cappella group needs.

When I finally reach home, my chest burns and my feet sting. I know what Father will say at the sight of me and take time to catch my breath. I run my fingers through my hair and swipe at my face with the yellow silk sleeve of my blouse. It leaves a large, wet stain and I roll up my sleeves to hide the mess.

When I’m finally presentable, I squeeze my fractured heart pendant for courage and trudge up the front steps. I even raise my hand to knock…

I can’t do it. I can’t go back to my life with Father when all my bruises have only just started to heal. Not after the fairy tale dream my princes showed me: singing with Tate and talking about songwriting with Charles; JJ, cooking me delicious meals; Tate and Charles getting fancy takeout; my Prince Charming and his teasing kisses; Charles with his rougher, all-consuming ones; JJ tugging on a strand of my hair, making flirtatious remarks I’m sure he doesn’t mean.