Page 146 of Love Felt Like This

Valentine’s Day

Beverly

I perch on Nana’s bed drinking coffee as she sifts through old photo albums.

Nana’s room is similar to mine. There are quilts and photos in wooden frames and little shelves with knickknacks from Grandpa’s travels with Birds on the Block. I’m curled into one of her quilts, still in flannel pajama pants and my same shirt from yesterday.

Smelling like Griffin Harvey.

I smile to myself.

It feels like I’m sixteen again, eager to go to school and see a boy. Will we act the same after our kiss? Will things feel different? I haven’t felt sparkles in my chest in so long. I forgot that crushes could feel like colorful beams of light through stained glass.

The way his beard brushed against my chin. His heady, hooded gaze. His deep laughter resonating through my chest, chasing my own.

Have I ever laughed while kissing? Have I ever had so much fun?

“Oh, look, it’s his first live show,” Nana says. Her head tilts to the side in adoration as Grandpa stares back at us from a photo. On the opposite page, there’s a photo of Nana and Grandpa on set in Japan for a Birds on the Block special: “Bernie Goes Abroad!”

“That was the best vacation we’d ever had,” Nana says with a sigh. “I always loved when we got to travel the world together. Oh.” She touches a palm to her chest. “And that jokester.” She guffaws, pointing out Finch in the background, making blurry bunny ears. She gives a soft sigh. “I wonder if he’s lonely out in Los Angeles.”

Los Angeles.

The butterfly wings in my chest halt flapping. Griffin and I are getting close to crunch time. How long can this truly last? How much longer will I experience Griffin and his half smile? Griffin and his guitar, permeating from the backyard garage and into my open window late at night? Griffin, whose lips brushed across my neck?

The doorbell rings.

“I’ll get it!” I say far too quickly.

The butterfly’s beating wings thrum again, almost making me woozy as I stumble off the bed.

I take the stairs down to the den two at a time, stopping just short of the door to run fingers through my messy hair. I swing it open to find Griffin with Ava. She clutches a single flower and a folded note in her fist. He’s smiling with a coffee cup in his hand and his gorgeous brown eyes taking me in.

“Hey,” I breathe out.

“Hi.” He extends the cup of coffee to me.

“What’s this for?” I ask.

“No reason.”

He sets Ava down, and she toddles past my legs and toward Steak. He’s wearing a pink bowtie collar, dotted with hearts. Very seasonal. Steak barrels up the stairs, and Ava follows.

I blink, taking the coffee and stepping to the side to let Griffin through the threshold. He barely fits, bulky shoulders and all. His hair, loose around his shoulders, lands in waves of mahogany. I stare at his chest and the black long-sleeved shirt is all too similar to the one I gripped in my fists last night.

“You look great today,” he says.

I just know my cheeks redden as I glance down at my flannel pants and shirt from yesterday.

“I look like a mess.”

“Not at all,” he murmurs.

And then Griffin bends down and kisses me.

Kisses me.

Just like that.