Page 130 of See You Next Tuesday

“Yes and no.” The tab on the kettle popped, and Walt poured Anya’s mug of tea. “It was like a perfect circle of emotion, if that makes sense. The thing you’re afraid of is the same thing that comforts you. So then you don’t feel afraid.”

Anya nodded tightly. Walt handed her the mug of tea; it was warm in her hands.

“Dad, do you think—” Anya started, but her voice caught.

“What is it, hon?”

“Do you think Mom would be disappointed?” she asked. “If I don’t end up like you guys? I mean, if I don’t have a family?”

“Anya!” Walt looked taken aback. “How could you think that?”

“I don’t know.” Anya shook her head, blinking rapidly. “Forget it, I shouldn’t have said anything.”

Walt looked at Anya for a long moment, like he was weighing something.

“Dad, what?” she prompted.

He sighed. “Your mother wanted you to be with Gabe.”

“She did?” Anya felt an ache in her chest—and a desperate urge to run back to her bedroom to check her phone. “When did she say that?”

“After Passover, when he came to seder. She could see how much you loved each other—we all could. Then he left, and you were so miserable about it, like a lovesick teenager.” Walt smiled sadly at the memory. “She wanted to tell you to confess your feelings, to go be with him, but I talked her out of it. We knew it was a complicated situation, and we didn’t want to hurt you any worse than you already were.”

Anya stared at her dad. It felt so strange and precious to learn anything new about her mother, let alone something that pertained so deeply to Anya.

“But then—why didn’t you tell me later? When he and I were together?”

“I didn’t want to pressure you. I wanted you to make your own decisions about your life, not do anything out of obligation to your mother.”

“And do you…” Anya swallowed. “I mean, do you agree with her? About him?”

“I didn’t then,” Walt admitted. “But after he had the idea for you to go to Orcas Island? I came around.”

“Dad, no, that was Kira’s idea.”

“No, hon,” Walt said gently. “It was Gabe’s.”

Anya’s head was spinning. This was too much to take in, on top of everything else this week—

“I ruined everything,” she murmured. “Dad, I really fucked up.”

“Not forever.” He gave her an encouraging smile. “And Anya, not for nothing, look around this house. It’s full of people who’d do anything for you. The next president of the United States is sleeping in our guest room, and she loves you like a daughter. Whatever happens with Gabe, I promise, you have a family.”

—

Anya walked back to her bedroom filled with purpose, five different plans already in motion. She needed to find him, that was the first thing. If he didn’t text her back, she’d call, and if he wouldn’t pick up, she’d figure it out some other way. She’d make Kira ask, or Preethi, or she’d call his assistant, Hannah—someone had to know where he was. Then she’d pack a bag and go to him, even if he’d run off to Antarctica. She hated to leave Jo and the team when they needed her so much, but this was more important; they’d understand. And then—she didn’t know. She’d figure something out. She’d do whatever was necessary until he took her back.

But when she walked into her bedroom and picked up her phone, she realized she didn’t need to do any of that. She dropped the phone and tore downstairs and out the front door, not caring who she woke.

Transcript of notifications from Anya Katz’s phone

[11:48pm] Missed call from Gabe Hunt

[11:49pm] Missed call from Gabe Hunt

[11:51pm] Missed call from Gabe Hunt

[11:55pm] Missed call from Gabe Hunt