Page 24 of Ghost Among Lies

"We've got some pretty powerful people in our corner. I'm not saying it's right or that we know what the hell we're doing. In fact, I'm sure we've screwed things up a few times already, but it's what Krista wants. She has no one else in her life, so yeah, we pulled strings to give it to her."

I wouldn't feel guilty for giving a young girl what she needed to feel safe and happy. Did I think we were the best choice? Not really. I was damn sure there was a family out there who could do better, but then I thought about other horror stories I heard. The thought of Krista going through something horrific again filled me with rage.

I already had one guilty conscience when it came to a child. I didn't need another.

"I don't mean to judge you or your team. I'm just trying to figure out the dynamic here and how this became your life. Whenever we’d talked about the future, you mentioned a big family and becoming a social worker. You wanted to help children like me. Now you kick ass and kidnap old flames."

The reminder of all the things I had once wanted churned my stomach, and I had to fight down the bile that threatened to prove I wasn't as strong as Hayes thought.

Hayes was right though. There had been a time in my life when we’d discussed a big family. We were both only children, and I remembered how lonely life was growing up. I wanted more for my future children.

Unfortunately, life was cruel, and I wasn't sure children were in my future.

"I still help people. Children included. I just do it in a different way. My team and I are sent in during the worst time in a person's life, and we make it better. We rescue and give them a second chance on life."

"And the fighting?"

I wanted to scream, “I did that because I refused to be a victim again.” I held my tongue though and gave a far vaguer answer.

"I took up martial arts after I left." A little white lie. I met Anita, dealt with the repercussions of the incident, and then swore I would learn to defend myself no matter what. "I discovered I liked it and wanted to study as many forms of it as I could. Turns out, I'm a quick study and fairly decent. I haven't stopped using it since."

"Is that when you met your team?"

I sighed. There was a fine line between revealing too much and leaving him to form his own––possibly wrong––conclusions. "Anita came first. She helped me in a lot of ways. Nyx and Lilith joined us after. Turns out, we had the same goal and different skill sets that allowed us to be a well-rounded team."

Hayes nodded. The wheels were turning in his mind, but I cut him off before he could sate his curiosity. "Why don't you get settled in? I'm sure Beckett can lend you some clothes while we grab your stuff." I looked him up and down. "You guys are about the same size." I took a step back out of the room. Putting some distance between us. "He can show you around as well while I meet with my team."

I took the coward’s way out and hightailed my ass out of my house, going in search of Anita. I didn't have to look long before I ran into her.

"Can Beckett help Hayes settle in?"

"He already agreed to it. He's got a phone call to make, and then he'll keep Hayes busy for a while."

I exhaled a relieved sigh. "Thank you."

Anita bobbed her head as a “you're welcome.” "Want to hit the mats and work out some of the tension?"

"You know me so well." I smirked.

"Nope. I just know what I would need in your position. My preference is torture, but since that's not your style, we'll do things your way."

We walked silently into the second gym. When we designed the compound, we wanted a gym to work out in and a separate space to spar. I was grateful for that forethought now. If Beckett knew we were in here, he would avoid it when showing Hayes around.

Neither of us bothered to change. In a real fight, we wouldn't have time to switch outfits, so we trained the same way we worked. In whatever we were wearing.

Anita didn't train in all the styles of martial arts like I did, but that didn't mean she didn't give as good as she got. By the time we were done, we both worked up a good sweat.

Sprawled out on the mat, I stared up at the ceiling and let my thoughts wander.

"You okay with Hayes in your house?" Anita pulled me from my thoughts.

"I'm going to have to be. I need to keep my guard up though. I don't want him knowing what happened."

"So you said."

"You don't agree?" Anita was as close to a friend as I got these days. Nyx and Lilith were great, but they came after everything happened. Anita was there from the beginning.

"It's not about me. You have to decide what's best for you and what you can live with."