Page 5 of Bless My Heart

I pump a few more times until I spill out into the condom, and we don’t move for a minute after finishing. I’ve still got her leg in my hand. Our foreheads are still touching. Both of us are breathing heavily. Hazel’s skin has a glow from a sheen of sweat. I want to lick it right off of her, but that might be considered weird since I really don’t know her.

I slowly pull out of her but immediately freeze. Something doesn’t feel right. I look down and see that the condom is almost empty.

There’s a tear on the condom. I feel the blood drain from my face. Oh shit. I just came inside a woman I don’t even know.

She must sense that I’m freaking out about something because she looks down at where I’m holding myself, broken condom still on.

“Oh, no,” she says.

“Yeah …”

“Ok, don’t freak out. I’m on the pill, so it shouldn’t be an issue.” Oh, thank fuck. I was seriously about to have a heart attack. I’ve never in my life had a condom break on me during sex; I was starting to think it was only a myth. I figured the odds were in my favor. But in walks this little purple-haired goddess, and she jinxes me.

“I’m really sorry. I don’t know what to say,” I tell her.

She runs her fingers through my hair, “Hey, no worries. It was amazing. Something I know I’ll never forget.” She laughs nervously. “Let’s not ruin it over this, ok?”

I nod my head. She’s right. She’s on the pill, so it’s not like we weren’t protected. It’s fine. Everything is going to be fine. We both clean ourselves up and check our appearances in the mirror.

I’m not sure what to say to her now. Usually, my nights don’t end awkwardly like this. “So …um, do you want to give me your number?”

She cringes. Like, actually cringes, and I fight back a laugh. I’ve truly lost my touch right now. “That’s probably not a good idea. I mean, we’re both just passing through, right? I don’t think either of us has any expectations beyond this moment. Am I right?”

“Yeah.” Jesus. This woman really just tells it like it is, which I can respect. “Ok, well…thanks?”

She laughs at me. “You’re welcome.” She turns and unlocks the door. I follow her out into the crowd of people but go back to Ozzy and Ezra instead of stopping at her table. I feel like that’s what she wants me to do.

“Hey, man. Where the hell did you go?” Ezra asks.

I grab Ozzy’s drink and take a large sip. “What the fuck?”

“Guys, I just fucked that girl in the bathroom,” I whisper so only they can hear. I don’t make it a habit of broadcasting my sex life, but these are my best friends. We tell each other everything.

“Holy shit,” Ozzy says, and Ezra’s eyebrows shoot up in surprise.

“I know.” I take another sip of Ozzy’s drink before looking over at Hazel’s table. She’s downing her drink. They look like they’re closing out their tab and packing up their stuff. Great. I’ve scared her off. Or maybe…I gave her what she came here for, so now she can go. Yeah, I’m going to go with that one.

Hazel gives me a shy smile when the ladies walk past our table. I wink at her because I literally cannot think of anything else to do. She knocks me off my game for some reason. I don’t know what it is about her, but I kinda like it.

Shortly after Hazel and her friends leave, we decide to head home as well. I hate that my friends didn’t pick up any women tonight, but I’d say we had a good guy’s night out. I mean, I know I did. Besides that part where I came inside a complete stranger. But it’s fine. Totally fine.

We pile into our Uber, and I debate telling the guys that the condom broke when I was inside Hazel. I kind of want them to reassure me that everything will be ok, but in the end, I decide to keep it to myself. I just want to forget that part of the night happened. I’ll just remember tonight as the night I got to fuck an extremely hot woman in a bar bathroom. It was hot and sweaty and fucking electric. Yeah, that’s how I’m going to remember tonight.

I glance at my phone and see a missed text from my mom reminding me my little sister is moving into the house I share with Ozzy and Ezra in two weeks. She’s starting her freshman year at Brunswick University, and I’ve got to remember to let the guys know they need to clear out the spare bedroom.

I let my head fall back against the headrest and close my eyes. I’m fucking exhausted.

CHAPTER THREE

HAZEL

Since I met all the challenges set before me on our last girls’ night, my friends have thankfully not made me go out to any more bars. They were satisfied with my performance with pretty boy Wes. They were both shocked I actually had sex with someone at a bar, but honestly, no one was more shocked than I was. It was completely out of character for me, but actually kind of … fun. I mean, the guy was hot. He made me feel so beautiful, which I haven’t felt in a long time, and I got two orgasms out of it.

I woke up the morning after with a headache and a very sore vagina, but it was worth it. Definitely worth it. The best part is, I never have to see him again. We came, we saw, we conquered. Or whatever. There’s no stress about a second date, or the will he or won’t he call me. It just is what it is.

Although, I will admit, I definitely wouldn’t turn him down for a second time in the sack. That man knew what he was doing. I haven’t had sex like that since, well, ever.

As much as I’m glad I’m not moping around and pining over Jordan anymore, I’m really not in the mood to date. I know this sounds cliche, but I think I need to focus on myself. I spent four years worrying about what Jordan needed and what I could do to be a good girlfriend to him. I feel like I lost some of myself in that relationship.